


✨ As It Should Be ✨ - On Hold

by sammysgirlforever



Category: Supernatural
Genre: 15.18, Destiel - Freeform, Destiel is canon, F/M, Fix-It, Gen, I Love You Dean, M/M, Multi, Post-Finale, Quote: But still beautiful. Still Dean Winchester., finale fix it, fuck you cw
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-10
Updated: 2021-03-05
Packaged: 2021-03-14 08:08:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 26,152
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28667490
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sammysgirlforever/pseuds/sammysgirlforever
Summary: *Originally on Wattpad but thought I’d start posting on both platforms because why not. Update every Friday.*SPN series finale rewrite and continuation! Starts in 15.18 then continues from there. There is a new character as it is a continuation of a scene from my Falling for Jared Padalecki fic. I recommend you read at least up to that point in the other fic but if you don't want to, a quick summary is in the first chapter. Destiel is canon. This is what I think that Sam, Dean, Cas, Jack, and Mia's (new character) lives should have been like instead of the disaster they call a finale.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester/Original Female Character(s)
Kudos: 3





	1. How 15.18 Should Have Ended

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys this is my SPN finale rewrite! This is piggybacking off my Falling for Jared Padalecki fic where Zoey gets the role of Sam's love interest Mia and part of this is used as my finale episode for that fic. If you haven't read that and don't want to, though I think you should, Mia and Sam knew each other at Stanford and got back in touch with each other then started dating about 6 months ago at this point. About 3 months after they started dating, Mia joins the boys on their hunting and they train her. Okay, now that you're caught up on the new character, enjoy! Love y'all!

**The Road So Far - Jack turned himself into a bomb to absorb cosmic energy and used it to save Sam and Dean then make Chuck human, causing himself to become God. Billie was after Dean and Cas and they're trapped. Cas realizes he has to experience his true happiness in order to call the Empty and save Dean.**

*Flashback*

_Billie is pounding on the door as Cas has his hand on Dean's shoulder and tearfully says, "Dean, I love you!"_

_Dean looks at the angel, his heart filling with relief because that's all he'd wanted to hear from the moment they met, and says, "I love you too Cas."_

_Mia then comes behind Billie and grabs her scythe, swinging it around to cut off Billie's head, noting to herself that the morning workouts with Sam really were paying off._

_As she kicked the door in like Dean had taught her just a few months before on her first hunt, Cas throws Dean out of the way so the Empty can take him. Dean becomes a crumpled, crying mess on the floor as Mia cries out, "NOOOOOO!!"_

_After the Empty disappears and Mia processes what just happened, she rushes over to comfort Dean but he pushes her away and says, "Mia go away."_

_Mia says, "Dean we will find a way to bring him back, I promise."_

_Dean practically yells this time, "Mia I said go away! Leave me alone!"_

_Mia jumps but walks back to the main part of the bunker and starts searching for something, anything, on the Empty. After going through probably close to 100 books, she realizes that she hasn't seen Dean since she left him so she went to look for him in his room but he wasn't there._

_She then found him in the same spot she left him, asleep and curled in a ball. She gently shook him awake and tells him to go to his room. He nods and slowly gets up, doing everything he can to not start crying again, but fails and is silently bawling before he gets to the door._

_Mia sees but says nothing, and let him go to his room to be alone. She stands there for a minute, her heart aching for Dean because he just lost the love of his life but also because she just lost an amazing friend. It killed her to see Dean like this. There were no words that could make this kind of hurt better. Nothing could fix it except getting that person back._

_She finally broke down herself, not being able to hold it in any longer as it wasn't being fueled by research. She sat down exactly where Dean had just been and put her face in her hands praying, "Jack please! I know you don't want to be hands-on like Chuck was but I'm begging you, bring Cas back. PLEASE! Losing him just may break Dean. I haven't known you guys for very long but I know soulmates when I see them and I could see it as soon as I heard the way Dean said Cas's name. They're so stupidly in love with each other. It reminds me of Sam with Jess, honestly. Jack, they deserve each other and they deserve to be happy so please Jack bring him back!" then sat and cried until she also fell asleep until Sam found her a few hours later, bringing her to their bed._

_Mia woke up slightly when Sam picked her up but just as quickly fell back to sleep once she realized she was in his arms and again when he set her on the bed and then laid down next to her, rubbing her back._

_When Mia woke up the next morning, she rolled over and expected to see Sam at least in the room but he was nowhere to be found, she even had gotten up to see if he was in the bathroom connected to their room despite not hearing the shower. She grabbed her fuzzy blanket from the bed and wrapped it around her shoulders then walked to find him._

_As she walked past Dean's room, she heard the end of Can't Help Falling In Love by Elvis switch into the beginning of Picture by Kid Rock and Sheryl Crow. She stopped in front of his door for a second, smiling sadly at it, then walked to the kitchen and saw Sam cooking._

_His back was facing her so she leaned against the doorframe for a minute, watching him cook and smiling. Then, she walked over to him and wrapped her arms around his waist and felt him relax a little, not realizing until then how tense he was, as he placed a hand over hers saying, "Hey baby."_

_She smiled into his back and said, "Hey, what are you doing?"_

_He said, "Cooking for you and Dean. I woke up and you were sleeping still and I know Dean's not going to eat unless I make him so," then shrugged his shoulders, "Plus, it gives me something to do."_

_Mia said, "oh okay. Yeah, he's not doing well in there at all. I heard him blasting Can't Help Falling In Love and Picture when I walked past."_

_He nodded and said, "yeah he's definitely not doing well if he's playing those. I wish there was something we could do for him."_

_Mia said, "yeah me too," as Sam flipped a pancake then turned around to kiss her then said, "go back to bed baby. I wanted to surprise you. I'm almost done."_

_She said okay and stood on her tiptoes for another kiss then walked back to the room, stopping in front of Dean's door again. She knocked and said, "Dean I just wanted to remind you that Sam and I are here for you. I love you and so does your brother," then waited for a response but only got the radio being turned up and she heard him sobbing to Angel With A Shotgun._

_Then, she walked back to the room and watched Scooby-Doo until Sam came in with a tray full of pancakes with strawberries and whipped cream on top, coffee with the perfect amount of cream and sugar, and a small omelet. Sam sat it on the bed in front of Mia then climbed on the bed next to her. She said, "babe! This looks amazing! Thank you!" then hugged him and kissed his cheek, and started eating._

_They sat in silence for about 10 minutes, eating and watching Scooby-Doo, when they heard a knock on the bunker door. Mia turned the TV down as she and Sam looked at each other then they heard the knock again. They both knew Dean wasn't going to go answer it so Sam grabbed his gun from the desk and they went to see who was at the door._

_Mia stood behind Sam as he pointed the gun at the door while opening it. When he opened it, Jack walked in and Sam said, "Jack what are you...?"_

_Jack said, "I heard your prayer, Mia. I'm here to help," then snapped his fingers and Cas appeared._

_Mia and Sam both reached out to touch him to make sure he was real as Dean stood by the map table and said, "Cas?!"_

End chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feedback is appreciated. Guess I’ll put my normal Wattpad end A/N here?
> 
> Hope y'all like it! Enjoy! Also, the flashback continues into Chapter 2, I just like cliffhangers. Remember; Always Keep Fighting, Love Yourself First, You Are Enough, You Are Not Alone, and You Define You. Love y'all!


	2. Christmas Dinner

**The Road So Far: Cas and Dean confessed their love before Cas got taken by the Empty, devastating everyone, but especially Dean. Mia prays to Jack, asking him to bring Cas back, and Jack hears then comes to the bunker and brings him back. Dean comes out of his room after somehow hearing all the noise and the first person he sees is Cas.**

" _Cas?!" Dean says and they all turn to him._

_Cas looks at him with a slight head tilt and says, "Hello, Dean," and it's clear to everyone that Dean is doing his best to not break down as he runs up the stairs to hug him. They wrap their arms around each other and hug like it's the end of the world._

_As they kiss, Jack smiles and says, "see you guys Friday for dinner," then disappears before they even blink. After Dean and Cas pull apart, Sam says, "Cas!!" and pulled him in for a hug. Cas hugs him back then Mia hugs him too and Dean says, "What happened?! How...?"_

_Mia smiles and wraps Dean in a hug then says, "I had faith, Dean. I prayed to Jack and he listened like I knew he would. He may not want to be involved but he knows how much Cas means to you. Plus, that's who he chose to be his dad and you of all people know what it's like to lose your dad."_

_Dean nodded and squeezed her tight, starting to cry. She squeezed back then gave him to Cas, who took him to their room._

_When Cas opened the door, Miracle jumped off the bed and ran to them, trying to jump and lick Cas's face. Cas laughed and gently pushed him away as he led Dean to the bed._

_Dean sat down then smiled and scratched behind Miracle's ears as he started to lick Dean's face, probably getting all the stained tears._

_Meanwhile, Sam and Mia were walking down the stairs and Sam said, "I don't believe it. I mean I know you said you prayed but still, I didn't expect him to actually do it._

_Mia said, "yeah I didn't either but I also really only did it because I didn't know what else to do."_

_Sam nodded and grabbed Mia's hand then said, "yeah well I'm glad you did."_

_Mia smiled as she and Sam faced each other and she said, "yeah me too," then stood on her tiptoes to peck Sam's lips._

**That was 3 years ago already,** Mia thought to herself as she smiled, looking up from her laptop to see Charlie (2) chasing Ash (4) and Ben (16) at the table with Miracle's head in his lap.

Charlie was Mia and Sam's little girl and after she was born, Dean kept telling Sam to propose because he was being shy about it but finally did when she was about 5 months old. Mia was ecstatic of course and Cas helped her plan it then they got married right after Charlie turned one. Dean and Cas got married about a week later on impulse while Sam and Mia were on their honeymoon and Jo had taken Charlie for the night. A few months later, they decided to adopt Ash when he was about 1 1/2. Ben came into the picture a few months ago after Lisa had died. He still doesn't talk to anyone except Dean much but he showed up at the bunker and said that his mom had told him to go there and take two letters with him. One was addressed to him and the other was addressed to Dean. They both had explained similar things; Dean really was his dad, Lisa did forget him originally but eventually got her memories back, and that she still loved Dean and knew he wouldn't let anything happen to Ben.

As Mia was about to go back to her writing, Sam came over and handed her a beer then said, "Hey babe what are you working on?"

She said, "you know I'm still only at the beginning. How was work?"

He said, "well it was work. No one new today but I did have to meet with my boss today for my yearly review and she gave me a pretty nice raise."

Mia said, "babe! That's great!" then gave him a hug and kissed his cheek.

He said, "thanks. So, who are we still waiting on? Because Jody is ready to serve everything whenever."

Mia looked around and said, "umm I think just Dean and Jack."

Sam shook his head and smiled saying, "like father like son."

Mia said, "well Sam, Dean does have his own business and you know how he loses track of time. I called him half an hour ago though and he said he was finishing up the car he was working on then would be on his way. And Jack is literally God so I'm sure he's busy too."

Sam said, "yeah true," as Charlie came and climbed in Mia's lap, wanting to be held.

Mia smiled down at her then kissed her head and said, "Hey baby girl, what's up."

Charlie said, "nothing Momma, I just wanted to sit in your lap," then leaned her head on Mia's chest.

Mia wrapped her arms around her then said, "okay baby," as Sam kissed their heads then said, "I'm gonna go see if Rowena is done with her spell yet."

Mia smiled and said, "oooo my little sexy witch in training," as he walked away and smiled at her comment.

Mia decides to put her writing away for now and enjoy having Charlie in her arms as she watched everyone enjoy each other. They were having a big Christmas thing so EVERYONE was there; Charlie, Donna, Jody, Rowena, Mary, John, Eileen, Garth, Kaia, Claire, Alex, Ellen, Jo, Bobby, Missouri, and more plus their little family that lived there.

Charlie came over to Mia and said, "Hey how's the writing going?"

Little Charlie jumped up and put her arms out to be picked up by Charlie, who grabbed her and said, "how's my mini me?!" as Mia said, "it's good! I've gotten a good chunk written. I'll write more after everyone leaves and the kids are in bed if I'm not too tired."

Charlie said, "that's good! I'm excited to read it!" as Little Charlie made it clear she wanted ALL of her attention.

Mia said, "well besides Sam, you'll be the first," then smiled and said, "go play with Charlie. She definitely wants to."

Charlie laughed slightly and said okay then walked off to the toys as Mia's gaze landed on Ben, who was looking down at his phone with a lost expression on his face. She watched him for a few seconds, noticing how much he was like Dean. He had almost all of his facial features and was very very handsome like Dean; he dressed pretty much exactly like him, complete with a fake Samulet he had found when exploring the bunker one day and said he would wear it for Ash until Ash could make him one on his own; he acted exactly like Dean, he only listened to AC/DC and other bands/artists like that, he LOVED classic cars and Scooby-Doo, oh and pie (you don't want to get between those two and their pie, especially when they're fighting each other); he was basically a clone of Dean but younger.

As Ben put his phone on the table and started looking around for something to do, Mia thought about how he must be feeling then got flashed back to the last hunt they went on.

_It was about 3 months after Jack had brought Cas back and the 4 of them went on a vamp hunt. Jack wanted to go but was busy rebuilding Heaven so he didn't._

_They all go into the barn where the vampires were at with the kids they'd kidnapped, like they normally did, on high alert and ready to shoot first and ask questions later. The vamps hid themselves well though and were able to sneak up on the four of them. Two of them were eventually able to pin Sam on the floor and Dean against a wall, though when Dean was being pushed he was able to barely redirect the vamp and missed a piece of the nail sticking out. Mia and Cas fought the other two and it was a back and forth battle for a minute until Mia and Cas were able to get close enough to chop their heads off._

_Once they were dead, Mia went to help Sam and killed the vampire that was on top of him and Cas did the same for Dean, though the vamp wasn't on top of Dean, only against him and was making sexual/gay "jokes" the whole time. Mia and Cas swung at about the same time with Mia saying, "NO ONE SITS ON MY MAN LIKE THAT EXCEPT **ME**!!" and Cas said, "HOMOPHOBIA ISN'T **NICE**!"_

_They all hug and kiss then look for and save the kids, returning them to their parents. Once they're back in Baby and on their way back to the bunker, Sam says, "Hey Dean that was a pretty close call there. Are you okay?"_

_Dean said, "Yeah, Sam I'm fine."_

_Cas said, "Baby are you sure? You look pretty shaken up."_

_Dean said, "yeah Cas, I'm fine!"_

_Sam said, "you know Dean, no one would blame you if you wanted to quit hunting. We all could at any time. Honestly, I almost want to after that because I don't want to lose you yet. Especially not like that. Not when things are so good for us."_

_Dean looked at Sam through the rearview mirror and could tell by the look on his face that he was worried about losing him and how much it hurt that it was that close then said, "okay well Cas, Mia, what do you think?"_

_Mia said, "I agree with Sam. Plus, I don't know if I'd know what to do with him if he lost you."_

_Cas said, "yeah I agree with them too. I can't lose you again babe. Not after I finally feel like I have you," then picked up Dean's free hand and kissed it._

_Dean smiled at Cas and sighed then said, "okay. I guess then we'll go back to the bunker and be normal."_

_They all said okay then Mia laid her head in Sam's lap to sleep, Sam took out a book to read, and Cas sat silently watching Dean and looking out the window._

_A couple months later, Dean was starting to open his own car shop, Sam was waiting on acceptance letters from law schools, Cas had just gotten a job as a nurse so he could still use his powers for good since he wouldn't have to hide, Jack was finishing up Heaven, and Mia was figuring out how she wanted to start her book._

Mia smiled and came out of her flashback and saw that Sam was now playing with Little Charlie and Ash was asleep in the middle of the floor, that kid could fall asleep anywhere it was crazy. Then, she looked at Ben and saw him just sorta staring off into space and decided to go talk to him and see if he would let her connect with him at all.

Mia walked over to Ben and kneeled in front of him, channeling her mom and aunt sides. She said, "Hey Ben, I know this is a lot to take in still but I just wanted to say that we're all here for you. You're loved here and I'm here for you."

He said, "I know Aunt Mia. I just miss her so much and I know I can talk to you guys, it's just hard."

Mia said, "I know sweetie. You're exactly like your dad. But I promise you there's nothing wrong with sharing your feelings or crying other than when you think everyone is asleep."

Ben looked up at her and said, "How'd you know?"

She said, "Ben I have a 2-year-old, I'm a light sleeper. Plus, our rooms are next to each other and I have insomnia."

He said, "Oh. But are you sure it's okay? You're not gonna laugh at me or tell me to just suck it up?"

Mia said, "No of course not. We will all always be willing to listen, all you have to do is ask okay?''

He said, "okay," smiled, and hugged Mia while saying thank you.

She hugged him back and said, "You're welcome. Now we've gotta teach your dad he can show emotions too."

Ben laughed and said, "Yeah like that'll ever happen," then they pulled apart as Dean came in the door.

Everyone walked to say hi, Ben and Mia together, and Ben said, "Hey you think we can talk tonight after dinner? There's a lot I've been holding in and I'd love to tell someone a little about my mom."

Mia hugged him again and said, "of course. I'd love to listen to you and learn about your mom. I'm sure she was amazing since I know she's the only person that could come close to the way Dean loves Cas," then pushed him slightly and said, "now go say hi to your dad," and smiled as Ben got a huge smile on his face and ran to hug him like he was 5.

Mia sees Dean get the biggest smile she's only ever seen on his face when he's with his kids or talking about them as Sam walks up to her and puts his hand on her back saying, "Hey I heard you talking to Ben. You did amazing."

Mia smiled and said, "thanks, babe. Love you," then pecked his lips and walked to hug Dean and Jack, who had come in behind him.

After all the hugging was over, everyone helped bring the food out and they served themselves then talked and ate for like 2 hours until the kids got too impatient and wanted to open their presents. Everyone gathered around the giant tree, it went all the way up to the ceiling and the bottom was big enough for Little Charlie to stand under it almost, that Dean had asked Jack to make for them and put it in front of the stairs.

_It was Mia's first Christmas with the boys and she was super excited. Dean and Sam didn't seem to care but she knew that Dean was secretly excited._

_After everyone had gone to bed on Christmas Eve, Mia got back up and decorated the kitchen, the main bunker room, everyone's bedroom doors, and the tree. Plus, she also brought out all the presents she had bought and hidden for everyone then wrapped them and put those under the tree. She was exhausted and it was about 4am by the time she finished but she couldn't wait for the boys to see it, especially Dean because she knew he always made sure Sam had a Christmas and never really had one himself._

_She didn't want to accidentally wake up Sam so she slept on the couch they'd put in the main room and when she woke up, Jack and Cas were standing over her. Cas helped her sit up and said, "Mia did you do all of this?!"_

_Mia said, "yes. I wanted to make sure the boys had a good Christmas. Also, don't tell Sam but, I'm pregnant and one of his presents is a card with the positive test."_

_Jack and Cas said, "Wow! Congratulations!" and hugged her as she stood up._

_She blushed slightly and said thanks then walked to the kitchen to get breakfast started. As she was grabbing everything out, she said, "can you go get Sam and Dean up please?! Tell them to be out here in 10 minutes."_

_They said okay and went to get them with everyone coming out about 5 minutes later. Sam walked behind her, wrapping his arms around her waist and kissed her cheek then said, "this smells good. What are you making?"_

_She said, "thanks. And I'm making breakfast burritos. Go sit down. I'm almost done. And I have a present I want you to open before we eat."_

_He said, "okay. I love you," then pecked her lips. She smiled and said, "I love you too. Now go," laughing and pushing his chest slightly._

_About 5 minutes later, Mia came out and set the plates down then walked over to the desk and grabbed an envelope then handed it to Sam saying, "Dean, record this please. Sam, baby go ahead," and had a huge smile on her face._

_Dean said, "uh okay..." and started recording as Sam opened it, reading the card first, not even realizing the test had fallen into his lap._

_When he got done with the card, Sam got a big smile on his face and said, "wait really?!"_

_Mia laughed and said, "yes babe. Look in your lap," then he looked down and grabbed the test then smiled even bigger and kissed her then picked her up and spun her around._

_When he set her down, he grabbed her face and kissed her until Dean said, "okay gross! Stop!"_

_They all laughed then Sam said, "so get this Dean. I'm gonna be a dad!!"_

_They laughed again and Dean rolled his eyes then said, "yeah I figured that out."_

Mia smiled to herself as they all started to take turns opening presents. It took another 2 hours as everyone had at least one present. By the time all the presents were opened, the kids were so tired they didn't even want to play with theirs and Little Charlie and Ash were passed out next to each other, halfway under tree and halfway under the stairs. Alex and Claire looked like they were close to passing out because they ran around with the kids so much, Rowena looked half bored and probably wanted to get back to her spells, Jody was exhausted from cooking, and most everyone else had kids so they all decided to get going. All that was left was Mia, Sam, Jack, Dean, Cas, Ben with Ash and Charlie still under the tree.

Cas picked up Ash to put him in his room and Sam did the same with Charlie then Dean said he was gonna go shower so it was just Ben and Mia at the table.

After a few minutes, Mia said, "Ben, you wanna go talk now?"

Ben looked up from his phone and said, "yeah sure," then got up and started walking to his room with Mia following.

End chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys like it!! Remember; Always Keep Fighting, Love Yourself First, You Are Enough, You Are Not Alone, and You Define You. Love y'all!


	3. Jess

**The Road So Far: It was Christmas! Jody made dinner and Jack and Dean were late. Everyone had fun and the kids got pooped out. Mia was able to connect with Ben a little and got him to talk to her somewhat. He even asked her to talk once everyone went to bed.**

Once they got to Ben's room, they sat down on the bed next to each other and Mia said, "what's up?"

Ben said, "Ever since my mom died I've just felt so lost and empty. Even being around you guys and having my dad, I just still feel so alone. And I feel like I should be okay now but I miss her so much. I mean she wasn't always around a lot but I know that's because she had to work her butt off all the time. And she's my mom. She's all I ever knew," then started crying and leaned on Mia.

Mia said, "aww sweetie. I know what it's like to feel lost and alone like that. It sucks but you'll get through it, I promise. And there's no timeline for grief. I'm not gonna say it gets easier because it's not that it gets easier, you simply just learn how to live with a hole in your heart. And sure eventually there will be days where you can talk about them or think about them without wanting to cry but you don't need to rush it. How, when, and where you get there is different for everyone and that's okay. I still think about and miss my family every day. So, no timeline. And never let anyone make you feel bad for still grieving because even years later, I'm still grieving."

He hugged Mia and said, "what happened?"

She said, "my mom, dad, and sister were going to dinner and got hit. I was at Stanford with Sam so I was nowhere near them."

He said, "Oh. They got in a car crash like my mom?"

Mia said, "yeah. [A few beats of silence] Is there anything else you want to say or talk about?"

Ben said, "umm, no, just talk about my mom I guess."

Mia said, "okay well tell me about her!"

Ben said okay then they talked for about an hour and he told her about Lisa's favorite food (lasagna), her favorite song (My Heart Will Go On), her favorite movie (Titanic), how she was always so strong and never gave up and she always gave her all, and Ben's favorite thing about her; no matter what happened she always had more love to give, even when the person she gave it to didn't deserve it.

By the time they were done talking, Ben was laying on his bed with his eyes barely open so Mia covered him up, kissed him on the forehead, told him she loved him, then walked to the kitchen to grab water.

On her way to her room, she heard The Night We Met from Dean and Cas's room and smiled, knowing they were in there dancing and started to think about when she first met Jess and Sam. It was the first and only time she had seen someone smile so big and bright and also the first and only time she'd ever been jealous of another girl.

_In the first few weeks at Stanford, Mia had kept to herself. She was having trouble in English so her teacher had recommended Jess, who was "the brightest student of all the English majors" and needed the tutoring credits. Mia had messaged Jess and she'd suggested they meet and study at her and Sam's apartment._

_Mia knocked and Sam opened the door so she said, "Hi, um I'm looking for Jess?"_

_Sam said, "yeah, she's in the bathroom. You must be Mia."_

_Mia said, "yes. You must be Sam."_

_Sam said, "that I am," and smiled and laughed as Jess came out of the bathroom rolling her eyes and laughing then grabbed Mia's hand to lead her into the kitchen and said, "Sam go study!"_

_Sam said, "alright, alright, I'm going! Love you," then pecked her lips and walked to the other room._

_The girls sat down and Mia leaned over the table and whispered, "okay so_ **_where_ ** _did you find him?! He looks fucking perfect!"_

_Jess laughed then whispered back, "I know right! He doesn't just look perfect, he_ **_is_ ** _perfect!"_

_Mia said, "yeah I bet," then they got focused and studied._

Mia had become fast friends with both of them and was constantly spending the night on their couch. After Jess's death, there was a rumor that Sam had done something and then left but Mia never for a second believed it and now she knows what actually happened.

Mia walked into her room smiling and Sam, who was sitting on the bed, looked up and said, "Hey babe. What you thinking about?"

She said, "the first time I met you and Jess. I had never been more jealous of another girl until then or seen a smile as bright and big as yours. And your smile is still the biggest and brightest."

Sam smiled and said, "awww thanks. You ever miss her?"

Mia said, "all the time. I think about her every day, her number is still in my phone even."

Sam said, "really? I thought I was the only one still grieving."

Mia said, "well you're not. You guys were my best friends and after you left I still hung out with our friend group but it wasn't the same."

Sam said, "Oh. I'm sorry," as he pulls her into his chest and onto the bed then continues, "you know her anniversary is coming up soon."

Mia looked up at him and said, "yeah next week right?"

Sam nodded his head and Mia said, "We should do something. Like we could go on a little road trip and listen to a playlist of her favorite songs on the way to her grave then leave flowers and maybe stay a day or two and visit or something."

Sam kissed her head and said, "Mia that sounds like a great idea. We can talk to everyone in the morning."

Mia smiled and said okay then got in the shower.

When she came back, Sam was laying on his back shirtless and sprawled out like he'd been waiting for her to get out. She smiled and climbed into the bed, snuggling into his chest. Sam moved slightly to wrap his arms around her and she felt him smile then kiss her head and she whispered "love you" even though he was already back asleep.

The next morning they talked to Dean, Cas, and Jack, who were more than willing to let them go and keep Charlie. Mia and Sam left about 2 days later after figuring out that Cas was going to take some time off work to help watch the kids (usually Mia and Ben did it since she was writing still) and Charlie and Jody had both already agreed to watch them when it was needed.

They planned to be gone for about a week since it took 3 days to get there, 3 days to get back, and they were gonna stay about 2 days; but they packed enough for a week and a half in case they were gone longer since they weren't really gonna rush and planned to take their time. Once they left, they didn't really stop except to go to the bathroom and stretch and just switched off on driving and sleeping when it was needed. They also brought food with them so only stopped for food once each day.

Before they left, Sam made a playlist of all the songs he could think of that Jess loved then Mia added some as well. They also added some that made them think of her then kept adding to it throughout the trip as well. When it was complete, the whole thing was about 5 hours long.

They also talked about their favorite things about Jess and their favorite memories with her. Sam even said his biggest regret was that he never got to propose to her and Mia said hers was never getting to see Jess graduate.

Once they got to California, they checked into their room and got everything set up. One of Mia's favorite things about Sam was how organized he was; she hated messes and especially hated when the other people around her didn't respect that.

After they were set up, Sam surprised Mia by telling her to go shower then get dressed up to go to dinner because he wanted to show her his and Jess's favorite place to go.

When they got back, they went to bed so they could get up while it was still dark (Jess's favorite time of day was sunrise) and wanted to get to her grave at about sunrise.

_Mia woke up smiling on the couch after another late night of studying. Jess was playing her morning playlist, which had a bunch of different types of songs on it, and probably got in the shower._

_She and Jess had stayed up until they couldn't keep their eyes open anymore and they decided to just leave everything out and pick it up in the morning so it was all over the coffee table._

_Once Mia could keep her eyes open, she stretched then got up and started cleaning up their books and papers._

_Sam came out in his shorts as she was stuffing the last of the papers in her bags and asked her what she wanted to eat. She asked for an omelet, the same thing as always, and he said okay then walked into the kitchen as Jess came out dancing and singing._

_Mia couldn't help but start laughing and singing along as Jess grabbed her hand to pull her to dance, spinning her around, then grabbing the broom to start sweeping and using it as a microphone._

_Mia smiled and threw her head back laughing then went into the kitchen to do dishes and clean up her and Jess's late night snacking messes._

_Sam always went to bed way before them or he stayed up doing his own studying and trying to wait for Jess but whenever he stayed up, he ended up passed out on his books. The girls always planned to just study but also always end up talking about anything and everything so studying takes forever and Sam ALWAYS hears when they start to get off track and laughs to himself because he loved them both so much and loved that Jess had someone like Mia. He may have been done with hunting but he also still knew something could happen at any second so he was happy Jess had someone else she was super close to except him._

_After they ate, it was time for them all to go their separate ways and go to class so the 3 of them walked to Mia's dorm then Sam and Jess walked to their classes while Mia finished getting ready for hers._

Their plan was to go to her grave then a bunch of Jess's favorite spots plus Sam wanted to show Mia some of _his_ favorite spots and Mia wanted to go to a few stores as well. Then, they wanted to end the night watching Jess's favorite movie in the hotel room.

Once they got to the grave, Sam hung back a little and let Mia go up first. She sat down and placed the flowers down on the bottom of the headstone then said, "Hey girlie. Umm, I miss you a lot. Sam has changed so much since you last saw him but I'm taking care of him though. And I promise I never did anything or thought about doing anything while you were together." She starts to cry a little bit as she continues, "I was actually helping him pick out engagement rings when you died and um... he was gonna propose after his interview that Monday because he knew he'd get in and knew that you'd say yes so he wanted it to be the happiest day of his life. I wish you were here to see him. I know you guys would be so happy together right now. Um, we have a little girl named Charlie now. She's two and beautiful and so smart like her dad. Rowena, a family friend, and a witch is already trying to show her spells and of course, I'm the only one against it since Rowena has been teaching Sam since they met but I just want her to know she doesn't have to be a part of that stuff so Sam and I compromise and limit how much she gets taught. You would love Charlie so much, Jess. She's such a firecracker and LOVES music. She's always up early as hell too so I know you guys would get up early together. I love and miss you so much. You meant the world to Sam and me and still do. You guys were my best friends there and once you died and Sam left, I was pretty much alone again."

By now she's full on sobbing and Sam sees so he comes to comfort her as she cries into his shoulder repeating over and over again, "it's not fair. Why her. I miss her so much." Sam just rubbed her hair/back and did his best to soothe her. After about 10 minutes, she looked at him with bloodshot eyes and red cheeks from crying so much and said that she was gonna go to the car and let him have his time. He wiped the tears from her face then said, "are you sure?"

She nodded her head and said, "yeah, I wanna be alone for a bit right now anyway."

He said okay and she walked to the car then blasted Who You'd Be Today by Kenny Chesney on repeat and cried.

Meanwhile, Sam sat the flowers he bought next to Mia's then immediately got tears in his eyes and said, "I'm so sorry Jess. I'm so sorry. I should've found a way to tell you about the hunting. I shouldn't have left. I should've done something. You shouldn't have died. I love you so much. I was gonna propose and we were gonna get married and Mia was gonna be the maid of honor. I had it all planned out already. I knew exactly what I wanted and how to get it and Mia had helped me plan everything out. I'm sorry your life was taken because of my stupidity. Because I actually thought I could have a normal life then. When my mom's killer was still out there. Gosh after all those years of training... I should've known. I'm sorry..." and then he ends up crying for about 10 more minutes before going back to the car with a red face and bloodshot eyes as well.

When Mia saw Sam, she turned the music off and then he got in and they both sat in silence for a minute. They could tell they both felt as bad as the other looked so as Sam drove off, Mia suggested they go to Jess's favorite ice cream place and Sam nodded his head then drove in that direction.

After ice cream, they went to a bunch more of Jess's favorite spots, ending with her favorite park to watch the sunset.

Once the sun was down, they decided to go to the bookstore Mia wanted to check out then a few places Sam wanted to show her.

After they were done with that, they decided to go back to the hotel and changed then went out to Mia's favorite place to eat, a Mexican food place with really good tacos. They spent about 2 hours there eating and talking then went home and passed out pretty quickly.

They ended up waking up around noon, which sucked because they wanted to be up by 10, and then they showered together "to save water," though it took almost as long as if they'd taken their own because they kept making out. After the shower, they got dressed then left and went to Stanford, about 15 minutes away.

The first thing they did was go to the administrative office to get passes so they could get around campus. After they had their passes, they went to Sam's dorm hall he had as a freshman then Mia showed him hers. Next, they went and said hi to their old teachers. Only one of Sam's was still there but 2 of Mia's were. They talked to each teacher for about 5 minutes since it was between classes. All the teachers wished them luck and were happy to see them happy. Sam's teacher said he was glad to hear that he ended up finishing.

After that, they decided to grab some lunch then hung out in one of the common areas that had a bunch of games and stuff on campus. After 3 rounds of Dance Dance Revolution, they went to check out the library and walked around showing each other their favorite books.

They ended up being there until the library closed at midnight and finally decided to go back to the hotel and watch a movie, though Mia fell asleep in the middle of it. Once Sam realized she had fallen asleep, he turned the movie off and snuggled into her then kissed her forehead and said, "goodnight beautiful. Sweet dreams," and quickly fell asleep himself.

As he drifted to sleep, he was thinking about how much he missed Jess and how he kinda felt guilty for being with her best friend but also knew that he was always loyal to Jess and that she'd want him to be happy. He ended up falling asleep with a smile on his face because there was no doubt in his mind that Jess would be okay with the two of them being together if he and Jess weren't. He also was able to finally make a little bit of peace with Jess dying because if Jess were still here, he'd be with her but maybe there was a reason that he was with Mia instead of her.

End chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little shorter this week but I hope you like it!!! Happy new year's! Have a good 2021! Remember, Always Keep Fighting, Love Yourself First, You Are Enough, You Are Not Alone, and You Define You. Love y'all!!
> 
> Also, I want to start this thing I'll call quote of the week where I share a funny or inspirational quote either from Supernatural or from one of the actors/actresses and probably occasionally someone else as well and I will put the same quote in this story, my Jared one called Falling for Jared Padalecki, and my Jensen one called My New Family.
> 
> For the first week, I chose a quote by Jared that I just heard him say in his and Jensen virtual Creation panel when I finally watched it like last week. He says, "I think it's the mistakes that make something perfect." He may have been talking about how the demon blade got connected together backward and how it then had to stay that way for the rest of the show but I still found it really inspiring and sweet.


	4. Work Fun

**The Road So Far: Mia and Ben talked and got a little closer. Sam and Mia then went to California to visit Jess's grave and show each other their favorite spots in town.**

About a week later, Dean came home from work and saw Mia at the table writing while Ben was across from her doing homework. By the number of books he had around him, Dean assumed it was something like Chemistry or Math. Dean walked over to give them both hugs but Mia refused until he showered so he sat down then asked where the kids and Sam were.

Mia said Sam went for a run and the kids were down for their naps. Dean said okay then said, "Hey Ben, how would you like to come to work with me tomorrow?"

Ben looked up at him excitedly and said, "really?!"

Dean said, "yeah! Tomorrow's Take Your Kid To Work Day or whatever it's called and I'd love to have you come and show you off to the work crew."

Ben said, "yeah! Sure!" then ran and hugged his dad with a huge smile on his face. Dean smiled just as big and hugged back. Mia smiled too and thought to herself that Ben was probably excited because he _finally_ had a dad to do these kinds of things with.

As Ben went to sit down, Dean said, "You _have_ to go to bed right after dinner though because we have to get up at 4."

Ben said okay then continued with his homework, even dancing in his seat a little.

Dean went to stand up but Mia turned to him and said, "speaking of. Dean, I was thinking about doing a chapter on everyone in my book and was wondering if I could follow you around work for a day sometime? Not tomorrow obviously but maybe this week?"

Dean said, "yeah sure. How about Wednesday? Cas has off and Jack should be able to help a little bit."

Mia said, "okay cool," then Dean went to get cleaned up.

When he got back, dinner was ready and Ben was picking up his books. The kids were up from their naps and already in their chairs as Cas had gotten them up, and Sam came out of the shower a few minutes after.

Sam kissed Mia then sat down and they ate while laughing and talking about their day for like an hour then Dean and Ben went to bed.

As they walked to their rooms, Cas was leaving for work so they all hugged then Ben said, "bye Dad!" while walking away.

Sam and Mia stayed up for a few hours to run around with the kids and then when they went to sleep, Sam worked on research for a new case and Mia worked on her book.

_It was the first time she felt like Dean finally accepted her as a hunter and part of the family. He had found a case about 5 months after Mia joined them but Cas was busy helping Jack, Sam was sick, and Dean really didn't want to go alone._

_She hesitated at first, thinking he only wanted her to go so he could tell her she didn't belong with them and that if she wanted to stay she needed to work harder - she seriously thought he basically hated her - but Sam pushed her to go and said it was a good thing, that he was opening up and trusting her more._

_She went and for the first few hours, they just listened to music, both singing along to practically every song until Dean pulled into a diner and turned the music down then said, "Sam told me you don't think I like you?"_

_Mia looked in her lap and said, "well yeah... You just don't seem to really care what I think and act like I'm not around and ignore me."_

_Dean said, with serious concern in his voice, "what makes you say that? Have I ever done those things other than when I'm tired or upset?"_

_Mia, still looking down, shook her head and said, "no, I guess not."_

_Dean said, "I'm sorry I ever made you feel that way but I love you, Mia. I think you're an amazing person and an even better fit for Sam. Honestly, I like you guys together more than him and Jess."_

_Mia smiled and said, "thanks but you didn't know Jess. She and Sam were perfect."_

_Dean said, "yeah well would_ she _have challenged me to a pie eating contest and_ ** _won_** _? Or drive with me like this and blast my_ ** _stupid_** _music_ while _singing along?"_

_Mia shook her head and said no then looked at him to see a smile on his face as he said, "I didn't think so. See, you're the perfect girlfriend for Sam_ **_and_ ** _you get along with me."_

_Mia smiled and said, "thanks, I guess you're right."_

_Dean smiled again and said, "I know I'm right. Now, let's go in and eat and have a good time_ then _I'm calling a rematch on that pie eating contest," and opened his door and climbed out._

_Mia got a huge grin on her face and said, "oh you're on!" then opened her own door and got out, bumping him out of the way with her butt as they both got to the front of the car._

_For those wondering, Mia_ **_also_ ** _won this pie eating contest, though it was only by a few bites._

When she finished writing, Mia smiled to herself then jumped because Sam snored and it scared her. She closed her laptop then smiled as she saw him asleep with his head on his book on the table. He always worked too hard at everything and _always_ brought something home for her and Charlie, who he adored more than anything in the world, and she was Daddy's Little Girl through and through.

Mia stood up then shook Sam awake, telling him he needed to go to bed and that she was going to go shower. He stretched then started cleaning his stuff up and was already back asleep when she got out of the shower.

*next morning*

"Ben get up!" Dean said as he turned Ben's room light on and pulled his covers off. Ben just groaned and rolled over to go back to sleep.

Dean said, "Ben come on. We gotta go. Be out to the kitchen, **dressed** , in 10 minutes or I'm coming back in here and you're not gonna like it," then shut the door.

Ben groaned and worked on getting out of bed then finally got up and got dressed. Once he got to the kitchen, he saw Dean at the table eating breakfast and sat down. Dean handed him an egg sandwich and said, "hurry up! We leave in 5 minutes."

Ben quickly ate then went to put his shoes on and even ended up beating Dean to the car. On the way there, Dean let Ben pick all the songs since they listened to the same stuff and it took only about 10 minutes to get there.

Once they were there, Dean unlocked the door then asked Ben to make sure the bathrooms had soap, toilet paper, and paper towels and mop them then went to unlock the rest of the doors.

When Ben finished, he put everything back then went to look for Dean and when he found him, Dean was counting the money from the safe to put into the drawers. As he was putting the 100's in there, Ben said, "Hey Dad, I'm done."

Dean said, "okay. Let's go look," smiled, and clapped a hand on his back then Ben smiled as they walked to the bathrooms.

When they walked into the men's room, Dean said, "wow Ben you do better than me!"

Ben said, "thanks! I used to do that all the time for a few months when Mom needed the extra help and I got a job."

Dean said, "she let you do that?"

Ben said, "no. She didn't know I was doing that and when she found out, she told me I could either quit or stop helping her so I quit."

Dean said, "oh. Well, looked like you learned a lot and she raised you well."

Ben said, "yeah she did... Dad, do you miss her?"

Dean pulled Ben in for a side hug then said, "all the time, son. All the time," then they walked out since they heard the bells jingle and went out to see Carlos, Dean's "assistant manager" walk in. The assistant manager thing wasn't an official title because Dean refused to let anyone do anything other than himself, he took too much pride in the place (and secretly hoped Ben would take over someday), but everyone knew Carlos would get that title and treated him as such.

Dean introduced them then Carlos immediately enveloped Ben in a bear hug and he was gasping for air before Carlos pulled away and said, "sorry I'm a big hugger and Dean talks about you so much I feel like I know you already."

Ben turned to Dean and said, "you really talk about me that much?"

Dean said, "sure do!" and smiled as Carlos said, "yup. You're his pride and joy."

Ben was absolutely beaming and you could tell hearing that meant a lot to him. Then, Carlos said, "He talks about Jack and Ash too, though not nearly as much as you. Oh and that girl uh... Claire. But you, he talks about the most."

Ben smiled and threw his arms around Dean then looked up at him and said, "wait, how many kids did you tell him you had?!"

Dean said, "you, Jack, Claire, and Ash."

Ben hugged him again and was beaming still as he said, "I love you so much, Dad. And Ash, Jack, and Claire."

Then, he showed Carlos his Samulet (Ashulet?) and said, "this looks like the necklace Uncle Sam gave my dad when they were younger so I say it's from Ash until he can get me something on his own."

Carlos said, "awww that's sweet," as Dean smiled and ruffled Ben's hair then said, "yeah Ben and Ash _adore_ each other."

At this point, they were all standing behind the counter as a customer walked in so Dean waved Ben to the back where they worked on the cars and Carlos took care of the customer. Dean showed Ben around the garage and started to work on a car they got the day before when Carlos came out and said the customer wanted a car wash and general check up and that they were bringing the car around.

Dean said okay then opened the garage door and waved them in. The customer pulled in then Dean showed them where to go to get inside the store. Once they were inside, he got under the car and checked all that he could while asking Ben about school. Once he saw that everything was good, Dean got out then lifted the hood and started asking Ben questions about where things were then showing him other things that he thought he might not know. Ben remembered a lot more than Dean thought he would from working on the Impala and was impressed.

After about 30 minutes, Dean said they were done there then they both went to get a bucket to fill it with soap and water and grabbed sponges. As they were walking to start washing the car, Dean turned the radio on and up as they both started dancing around singing. Dean almost tripped on a hose so they both cracked up laughing then started washing the car, talking a little but mostly singing. Dean started on the hood and Ben started with the windows, occasionally glancing up at his dad, just watching and admiring him. When the next song, Carry On Wayward Son, came on, they both smiled and sang along. As the drums hit, Ben started thinking about the first time they saw each other and then the first time he came to the bunker.

_Ben was 8 when he first met Dean and didn't know what to think about him other than he thought he was cool and that they had a lot in common but knew he liked him and honestly wished he had stuck around, even asking his mom questions about him after Dean left._

_After Lisa died, Ben was responsible for very little when it came to her funeral and what was going to happen with the house, his cousin or something was doing all that. He really just needed to go through and get whatever he wanted then figure out where he was going to stay. He planned on staying with his grandma, though he hadn't said anything yet, until he was going through his mom's desk and found two letters perfectly labeled in her handwriting. One said 'Dean' and the other said 'Ben.'_

_He nervously sat down and set the 'Dean' letter down, shakily opening the one with his name on it, and was crying by the time he finished reading his. The letter was a few pages long but it said that she loved him very much and explained that Dean was his dad and she was going to tell him when he was 18 but decided to write these letters in case something happened to her as well as the fact that the man he had been asking questions about randomly remembering at the time she wrote the letter was real and was Dean but he had erased their memories so they wouldn't keep getting brought into his stuff. The letter also left Dean's number as well as the address for the bunker._

_After he finished the letter and calmed down enough to think again, he finished going through the house then packed his stuff up and left, hitchhiking his way to the bunker._

_Once he got there, he knocked then, someone who looked like he might be Dean opened the door but Ben didn't want to assume so he said, "Hi um I'm looking for Dean. My mom, Lisa, sent me here. My name's Ben."_

_Dean's eyes sorta widened at hearing Lisa and Ben's names but tried to play cool and said, "yeah, I'm Dean. What happened to Lisa? Why'd she send you here?"_

_Ben held out the letter with Dean's name on it and said, "here. She wrote both of us one and in mine, she said you were my dad and that she trusted you to keep me safe so, hi dad... Uh, can I come in?"_

_Dean grabbed the letter and opened it and after a few lines, you could see his face soften, though he still did his best to act nonchalant as he pulled Ben in for a hug then pulls him into the bunker and hugs him again, slight tears in his eyes._

_Dean starts walking down the stairs towards the map table and says, "come on, we're about to eat dinner."_

_When they got to the table, everyone was sitting already so Dean stood at the end behind Ben and placed his hands on Ben's shoulders, and excitedly said, "guys, this is Ben. Sammy, you should remember him and his mom, Lisa. Um, Ben's my son, I guess, and," he looks down at Ben then continues, questionely, "well, Ben can you tell us why you're here?"_

_Ben said, "My mom died and she wrote these letters to Dean, or I guess Dad?, and I and said for me to come here and that she knew Dad would take care of me."_

_Mia stood and smiled at Ben then said, "well, welcome Ben! Sit down and I'll get you a plate."_

_Ben gave her a small smile and sat then she walked to grab an extra plate and they ate once she came back._

By the time Ben came out of his daze, the car was done being washed and Dean was asking him a question, waving his hands in his face. Ben looked at him and said, "huh? Sorry, I zoned out."

Dean said, "are you hungry yet? We're done with this one and can take a little break before starting on the one from last night if you want."

Ben said, "Oh uhh not really. Do you have any soda though? I am thirsty."

Dean said, "Yeah, sure," then walked to the cooler and handed him a Coke (the ones in the glass bottle), opening one for himself then setting it down and going inside to let the customer know he was done.

Once the customer left, Dean sat down in a fold-out chair and took a long swig of his Coke then said, "So Ben I know I already asked this but, how's school going? Really? You were just giving short answers earlier and I want details."

Ben smiled, loving that Dean really did care, and sat next to him then said, "it's good. My chem class is a little difficult but it's okay. And I'm still getting a B in it and A's in pretty much everything else."

Dean said, "that's great to hear, bud. Do you have any friends? Or girlfriends?

Ben shrugged his shoulders and said, "eh a few friends but no, no girlfriends."

Dean put his arm around Ben's shoulders and said, "that's okay. You don't need a lot of friends. And girlfriends will come eventually."

Ben nodded and said, "yeah... hey dad, can I invite Claire over for a sister/brother bonding night on like Friday or something? I want to get to know her more, especially now that I know you really do think of her like your kid."

Dean said, "yeah of course! I'll have Jody give Claire your number and then she can text you."

Ben smiled and said, "thanks, Dad," then hugged him.

Dean said, "you're welcome," then chugged the last part of his Coke and threw it away as he said, "come on kid, breaks over. Back to work."

The rest of the day was great. They worked on the car that came in last night, an old '84 Mustang, in between other customers and goofed off in between that, pulling pranks on Carlos and the other guys in the store.

When it was closing time, Dean had Carlos do the bathrooms then let Ben count all the money and showed him how to put it all in the safe and the computer.

As they were leaving and Dean was unlocking the driver's side door, Ben put his arms on the hood and, with a huge smile on his face, said, "thank you, Dad, for today. I had a lot of fun and I think I want to come back and maybe actually work here at some point."

Dean stopped unlocking the car and put his arms on the hood, key still in the keyhole, and smiled, then said, "you're welcome Ben. I'm glad you had fun," then they both got in and you could tell that what Ben had said meant the world to Dean.

End chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoy!! I loved writing this chapter! Remember; Always Keep Fighting, Love Yourself First, You Are Enough, You Are Not Alone, and You Define You. Love y'all!
> 
> Quote of the Week: "Pain is mandatory, suffering is optional." - Jared
> 
> This is something Jared said in his interview with Michael Rosenbaum and it just really touched me and really made me think and realize that yeah we're going to have pain, it even says in the Bible that we will have pain, but giving in to it and not fighting through it is a choice. We all have the ability to feel the pain and understand it and then move on/move through it or drown in it and honestly, it's easy to suffer or drown in something and not even realize what you're doing but once we realize that, we should focus on working through it and fixing it.


	5. Work Interview

Mia woke up and quickly turned off her alarm so it didn't wake up Sam and Charlie - he didn't need to get up for another hour and she just didn't need to be up yet - then got in the shower.

When she got out, she walked to her dresser and opened the top drawer for a shirt as Sam rolled over then softly said, "Hey, babe."

Mia turned around and said, "Hey, go back to sleep baby."

He said, "what time is it?"

Mia said, "It's 4:30. Go back to sleep. You need your rest."

Sam stretched then said, "No, it's okay. I'll get up and eat with you then shower once you leave."

Mia smiled as she pulled her shoes on then said, "If you really want to Sam but you need your rest."

He said, "No, it's okay," then got out of bed and went over and pecked her lips.

She smiled and grabbed his hand, cracking the door so they could hear Charlie if she woke up as they walked out to the kitchen.

Dean was there eating a bowl of cereal while listening to Heat of The Moment and when they walked in, Mia smiled as Dean said, "morning Sammy!"

Sam smiled back and visually cringed at the flashbacks the song gave him of watching Dean die over and over as Mis squeezed his hand comfortingly when she saw his face and felt him tense up.

Mia and Sam sat down as Dean finished his bowl and they poured their own, Mia eating quickly so she and Dean could leave.

Once they were done, they put their bowls in the sink then Mia told Dean she was going to go give Charlie a goodbye kiss as Dean got up and said to meet him in the car.

She said okay then walked to her room while Sam was sitting at the table looking at something for a case he was working on.

Mia quietly cracked the door enough for her to slip through. She walked to Charlie's crib and stood, watching her for a minute, then carefully kissed her forehead and said, "bye baby girl. I love you," and walked back out to say bye to Sam.

As she was hugging Sam, they heard Charlie crying so they quickly kissed and Sam said, "I'll get her. Don't worry. Go. Have fun. I love you."

Mia smiled and said, "you know me too well and should know that I'll worry no matter what. I'm a mom. It's what I do. I will have fun though and I love you too."

Sam started walking to the room as Mia started walking to the stairs then he said, "yeah, I know. But do your best baby."

She smiled back at him and yelled, "make sure Ben is up before you leave!" then stood by the door for a second, thinking about how much she loved him and Charlie, and walked to the car.

When Mia got to the car, Dean was headbanging and air drumming to the radio so she laughed and smiled. Once he realized she was there, Dean said, "Hey, you ready to go?"

Mia said, "yup! Let's see what all the excitement's about!"

Dean smiled and drove off, doing his best to not sing along or show interest in the next song since it was Shake it Off by Taylor Swift while Mia sang as loud as she could and asked Dean to turn up the radio.

Once the song was over, Mia asked if they could stop at Starbucks up the road. Dean rolled his eyes and huffed but pulled into the drive-thru anyway.

Mia said, "Hey, I'm not used to being up for like 3 more hours so I'm tired."

Dean rolled his eyes again and said, "Yeah, whatever," then asked her what she wanted.

Mia said she wanted a Venti Iced Carmel Macchiato and Dean ordered that plus got a Venti Carmel Frappe with whip cream and extra drizzle for himself. As he pulled up, Mia looked at him and he said, "what?! They're good and I figured we're here so I might as well."

_A/N - cue me seeing this in my head while thinking about Dean getting Starbucks._

Mia laughed and said, "yeah okay. Just admit that you only pretended to be annoyed and come here all the time by yourself."

Dean waved his hand at her and took a sip of his drink as he pulled out of the drive-thru.

At the shop, Dean showed Mia around the same way he did Ben while going around and unlocking the doors. When that was done, Dean went to the office and showed Mia everything he had to do on the computer and how to count all the money. He even let Mia do a few things when she asked because it seemed interesting and helped her write better if she actually did it.

When they brought the drawers out for the registers, Carlos was already there sweeping. Dean introduced them then, like with Ben, Carlos hugged Mia but was more respectful and only gave her a side hug, though he still gave her a squeeze before letting go.

Once he let go, Mia said, "how long have you worked here?"

Carlos said, "since it opened. I was the first person Dean hired and I'll be the last to leave if something happened to this place."

Mia smiled and said, "so it sounds like you like working here and work hard?"

Carlos said, "yes. I love working here and have never found a better place to work. Dean actually takes pride in the place, unlike other places I've worked at, and does what he can to keep it in tip-top shape so I do what I can to keep it that way as well."

Mia smiled and said, "well you both do an amazing job. What's you're favorite part about working here?"

Carlos thought for a second then said, "probably Dean, honestly. His energy when he's here is just amazing and so happy and infectious, you can tell he truly loves what he's doing."

Dean was behind the counters wiping them down and pretending not to pay attention but MIa saw a small smile creep up on his mouth at that comment and couldn't help but smile even bigger.

Mia said, "this sounds like an amazing place to work. I will let you get back to it though. Keep it up, Carlos."

Carlos said, "it really is. Thank you, Mia," then continued sweeping as Mia walked behind the counter to Dean.

He waved his hand for her to come to the back door and they went out to the garage. Dean grabbed Mia a water bottle from the cooler then showed her the 3 cars he was working on at the moment; the '84 Mustang that he and Ben worked on, a '97 Camaro, and a '67 Impala. His favorite was, of course, the Impala because he already knew what needed to be done and how to do it without a second thought.

As he walked over to the Impala, he said, "I wish Ben and I had gotten a chance to work on this one yesterday but I'll be able to show you a little bit after lunch if you want."

Mia nodded her head then said, "yeah! What did you and Ben do yesterday?"

Dean said, "We worked on a few cars that came in and worked a little bit on the Mustang in between but I'm waiting on a part to come in for it so I can't do much else yet and the Camaro won't take long, we just have to find the time since there's an oil change appointment in about 10 minutes."

Mia said, "well, what are we going to do until then?"

Dean said, "umm well what kind of questions do you have for me?"

Mia looked down at her phone and said, "what is your favorite part of the shop?"

Dean smiled and put his arms out as he said, "it's all mine," then looked around in admiration as they both laughed. Then, he said, "no but honestly just that I get to work on old cars all day and occasionally get to work on things like the Impala and can do it without thinking."

Mia smiled and nodded her head then said, "is there anything that your dad ever said to you that really stuck with you?"

Dean thought for a minute and said, "Protect Sammy. It was always about protecting him for me, ever since I carried him out that night, but my dad made extra sure that I knew that was always my first priority, no matter what."

Mia said, "so then I imagine it hurt when Sam left for school then?"

Dean nodded his head and said, "yeah. I think it hurt me more than my dad. I mean, Dad was, he was hurt but for different reasons. He was hurt because Sam was supposed to stay with us and that was our legacy and all that crap. He was more mad than hurt. I, I was hurt because I felt like someone I had been through everything with, someone who was basically my purpose and reason for being helpful was leaving. It felt like the only thing I knew was safe was gone. And when I went to see him that night at school, as you know, I stood outside for hours scared because I had already been most likely just left by my dad and I couldn't take the hurt I knew I'd feel if Sam didn't want me either. That night felt like the one who always gave me direction and told me what to do had left and the other person, my purpose basically for so many years, had left once so what was stopping him from doing it again? I was terrified that night."

Mia got up and was about to hug him and offer him some words of comfort but they were interrupted by a horn honking. Dean stood up and Mia took a few steps back as they watched the driver of a '98 Corvette, a big buff guy, step out then walk over to them and hand Dean the keys.

The guy said, "if there's a single scratch, I will sue," then walked into the shop.

Dean put his hands up in defense then mocked the guy after his back was turned, making Mia giggle, and went to put the hood up.

Once he did that, he checked the oil with the stick thingy (A/N - I didn't feel like looking up the specifics of what stuff was called lol) then asked Mia to hand him the correct bottle of new oil and showed her how to replace it. That took about 30 minutes and after the guy left, they started to work on the Camaro.

For that, Dean needed to rotate the tires, replace the air filter, and replace the windshield wipers. The first thing he did was the wipers because that was easiest and would take up most of the time they had until the next appointment.

He had Mia give him the tools he needed so she was involved and not just standing around, plus she asked him to let her do something with everything.

They only got one wiper done before the next person got there. They needed their headlights replaced and that took about an hour for each headlight.

Once that customer left, Dean and Mia put the other wiper on then Dean said it was time for lunch. They pulled their lunches out and sat down in the fold-out chairs, eating in silence for a few minutes.

When Mia was about halfway done with her sandwich, she said, "so I know your childhood was difficult, but could you tell me more about it? Like what's one memory or thing that really sticks out?"

Dean got a faraway look on his face and Mia could tell he was flashing back through something. When he finally spoke a few minutes later, this is what he talked about and explained;

_Dean's childhood was nowhere near normal, everyone knew that, but no one except Sam knew just how bad it got sometimes. He always protected Sam as much as he could and took the beatings instead of him. He still knew that Sam also got a few because he "failed as a big brother" and left John alone with Sam while he was upset. Every time, without fail, he'd come back to the hotel room to see Sam crying on the floor with John raging over him throwing slaps and punches at whatever parts he could of Sam. Dean always ran to them and pulled John off Sam, knowing it would just make John angry at him but he didn't care, he'd rather have the bruises and the pain over Sam. Whenever that happened, Sam knew to get out of the way and go patch himself up so that he could help Dean clean up the messes once John got drunk enough to pass out on a bed or chair and they were safe for the night. As warped and crazy as it might sound, those nights were some of Dean's favorite memories with Sam. They always ended up laughing about something and Dean knew that no matter where they were, Sam somewhat enjoyed school so he always asked about that, and sometimes they stayed up extra late to do homework if Sam wanted him to. They both could see the other one visibly relax and finally breathe when John passed out in that way because they both knew they were safe for a few hours at least. Neither one had to worry about fighting with each other and John getting mad or John just getting mad so they finally felt a sense of peace._

When he was done talking, Dean clearly needed some time to think and process so Mia let him for a few minutes then slowly got up and wrapped him in a hug. He hugged her back and whispered, "thank you."

She said, "you're welcome," and hugged him until he let go, which was a few minutes, but she didn't mind because she was learning more about Dean as well as Sam but also felt like she and Dean were _really_ connecting. I mean, yeah she knew he loved her and they had talked about personal stuff before, but nothing like this. He hadn't ever told anyone about the beatings except Cas, and that was only because he already knew, being a celestial being the size of a Chrysler building and all.

After Dean regained his composure, he finished eating then they finished the Camaro before _finally_ working on the Impala, Mia being as excited about working on it as Dean.

They spent most of the rest of the day on that car since there weren't any more appointments and no one came in, except the Camaro owner to pick it up. Mia got to help while learning about Dean's car, even though it technically wasn't Dean's car. It was great bonding time for them and you could see that Dean loved teaching this stuff to someone just like Mia loved learning about it from him. While they worked, music played in the background and they talked about whatever.

Mia asked what his favorite childhood memory was and about how he felt he was doing as a dad with all of his kids individually. Dean said his favorite memory was getting the Samulet because it made Dean realize just how much he was doing for Sam as well as the fact that Sam actually recognized and appreciated all he did for him. He also said that he felt like he did a pretty good job with Ash and Jack but felt like he could do more with Claire and Ben so had been doing his best to get to know them and connect with them more.

They ended up staying late to finish the car because they both enjoyed it so much, so they didn't leave until about 7 and the shop closed at 5. Everyone else had left already, Dean asking Carlos to lock the doors before he left and Dean would take care of the rest, so they were able to play the music a little louder and act like goofs dancing and singing around the garage. If Sam had seen them, he would have really enjoyed it and probably taken a picture or video.

After they finished shutting everything down and were ready to leave, Dean gave Mia a hug and she hugged him back saying, "today was great. You really do enjoy what you do and that's amazing," then smiled.

Dean smiled back and said, "I'm glad you had fun," then gave her a side hug and they walked like that to the car before going to their separate sides to get in. On the way home, they blasted music and Dean even sang along to songs that came on that he "didn't know."

At home, they walked in laughing and Sam, who was at the table, could immediately tell they had had an amazing day and couldn't wait to hear about it over dinner.

End chapter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoy! Remember; Always Keep Fighting, Love Yourself First, You Are Enough, You Are Not Alone, and You Define You. Love y'all!
> 
> Quote of the week: "Today is Tuesday... but yesterday was Tuesday too!" - Sam Winchester
> 
> I felt this quote was only fitting since all 3 of my stories this week have references to Mystery Spot and/or Heat of the Moment and that's my favorite line from that episode. Every Tuesday morning I text my friend "it was the Heat of the Moment!" then say "good morning Sammy," because that's such an iconic scene (in my mind anyway) and Heat of the Moment is our ringtone for each other. 😀


	6. What Heaven Should Be

Today Jack had agreed to take Mia to Heaven, at least for a little bit. He hadn't told her _when_ he was going to be getting her though so she slept in a little bit later than she usually does; Sam got Charlie up since he'd taken the day off to spend with her weeks ago.

Mia stretched and smiled as she heard Sam's deep laugh and Charlie's giggle coming from the kitchen. She got up and showered then went out to surprise them both.

She snuck up on Sam, telling Charlie to be quiet when she saw her, then put her hands over Sam's eyes.

Sam grabbed her hands and smiled as he kissed them then said, "Hey baby! What's up!"

Mia shrugged and said, "I don't know when Jack's going to come for me so I thought I'd hang with you guys until he does."

Sam smiled his goofy smile as Mia sat down and leaned over to give Charlie a kiss then kissed her cheek as she sat back down.

Sam put an arm around her shoulder as she pulled her bowl and the cereal towards her. She poured the milk then started eating as Charlie said, "Mama! Drink please!"

Mia's face lit up as she smiled and turned to Sam then said, "SHE JUST SAID PLEASE! SHE JUST SAID A NEW WORD!"

Sam smiled and said, "yeah, she said it this morning. I've been working with her more to get her ready for school."

Mia, still smiling brightly, said, "good!" then turned to Charlie and said, "good job baby! You're such a big girl!!" then got up to kiss her head.

She picked Charlie up out of her chair and started kissing her face.

Suddenly, Jack, who had appeared a little too close to Mia, said, "Hello, guys!"

Sam and Mia jumped then Mia backed away and said, "Geez! You're like your dad."

Sam said, "Yeah, didn't your other dad talk to you _both_ about that?"

Mia laughed and said, "yeah, personal space Jack. Hi, anyways."

Jack put his hand up and smiled then said, "Hi."

Mia handed Charlie to Sam then kissed them both and said bye as she walked over to Jack.

He said, "You ready to go?"

Mia nodded her head and said, "Yeah, let's go," then smiled.

Jack grabbed her hand and said, "Okay. Close your eyes."

Mia said, "why?"

Jack said, "You'll regret it. You'll get sick, at least, if you don't. Now, close your eyes."

Mia said, "Okay, okay. You're bossy for a 3-year-old," then smiled and closed her eyes.

Jack smiled then portaled them to Heaven. To him, it was slow, like driving a car to the gas station, but for Mia it was instantaneous.

After they got there, they stood for a few seconds before Jack said, "Mia you can open your eyes."

Mia did so then said, "wait, we're here already? How?"

Jack smiled then said, "we perceive time differently. It actually took like 10 minutes."

Mia said, "oh, cool," then looked around and said, "wow... this is amazing!"

As she looked around, she saw a long white hallway with a big open room at the end of it. In the hallway, there were various doors and in the big room, there were a bunch of angels walking around doing different things; it looked like the main room of an office.

Mia eventually said, "Jack this is so cool! But, I thought all the angels were dead?"

Jack said, very matter of factly, "they were. But I brought them back. An- and made new ones."

Mia said, "oh. Well, you did a great job from what I've seen so far."

Jack smiled and said, "thank you, Mia. Would you like to see more?"

Mia said, "of course!" and slowly walked forward, looking at all the doors individually and taking her time.

When they got near the end of the hallway, they stopped in front of the last door on the right. Mia looked at Jack and he motioned for her to go ahead and open it.

She did and saw a big white room with a big globe in the middle and a few other angels in the corner taking notes and whispering to each other.

Jack said, "this is the globe room - we're not very good at naming things, kinda like my dad - and this is how we check on all the humans and other angels down there at once. All angels have an assigned section and/or person, depending on their level of training and specialty. They all have to come in here periodically to check on their section or person and if they need help, they'll press the dot that lights up then it will let me know who went where as well as take them to whoever's in trouble," he points to the corner where 2 angels are and continues, "That's Naomi and Uriel. They reigned before, when Chuck was gone, but are in training again so they can relearn how to act and our values. Right now it looks like they're taking notes for their service class."

Mia stifled a laugh when she heard their names and when Jack was done, she said, "isn't Naomi the one who made your dad kill thousands of fake versions of your other dad to brainwash him or something?"

Jack said, "yes but she asked for a second chance so I wiped everything, except what she needed, then sent her to training."

Mia said, "wow. And then isn't Uriel the one who tried to start the Apocalypse? And kill Cas?"

Jack made a pained face but said, "yes. He was harder to... forgive but, as God I need to give everyone a second chance and he asked for one as well so he also got wiped then sent to training."

Mia hugged Jack and said, "sorry. This must be hard for you to talk about."

Jack said, "a little but it's okay," then smiled and said, "come one. You're probably hungry."

Mia said, "I am but I thought angels didn't need to eat."

Jack said, "we don't but we still do sometimes."

Mia nodded her head then let out another "wow..." as they walked into the cafeteria.

Jack walked through the buffet line with Mia and made sure she was sitting down then said, "now, you eat and enjoy and I'm going to take care of a few things. You can explore a little bit after you're done or come find me. And if you can't find me, just call my name."

Mia smiled and attempted to say okay but her mouth was already stuffed so it didn't work too well; everything tasted better here than on Earth.

Jack walked away and Mia started looking around, observing everyone and taking everything in. After a few minutes, she started to zone out and ended up thinking about the first time she met Jack.

_It was a few days after she'd joined the boys and had already met Cas - and she definitely saw the unnecessary tension between Dean and Cas that Sam told her about. Dean and Sam had gone to get food and have some "bro time" while she stayed in the hotel room reading a book; more of a journal really; that Dean had told her to study._

_She kept getting distracted or had to read things more than once because it was kind of painful at times and she couldn't always understand the code words so she was still at the beginning about 20 minutes after they'd left. As she read about Mary and Azazel then turned the page, Jack appeared. She didn't notice him at first, reading a little bit more until she saw a movement out of the corner of her eye. Finally looking up, she jumped in surprise when she saw Jack standing there._

_Jack tilted his head (the same way Cas does Mia remembers thinking) and said, "where are Sam and Dean?"_

_Mia narrowed her eyes then said, "I don't know who or what you are so I don't trust you. I'm not telling you anything," then leaned back in her chair, crossing her arms as she looked him up and down._

_Jack innocently said, "oh I'm Jack. Technically I'm Lucifer's son but I chose Castiel as my dad and, along with Dean and Sam, he teaches me how to be good."_

_Mia narrowed her eyes even more and said, "I still don't trust you. If you're really here for Sam and Dean then stand right there and_ **_don't move_ ** _until they get back."_

_Jack said okay and Mia slowly went back to her reading, glancing up every few minutes to check that he was still there and Jack just awkwardly stands there the whole time._

_It's about 20 minutes before Sam and Dean get back and when they do, Sam breathes out, "Jack," as he hugs him. Dean hugged him too as Sam said, "Mia, how come you didn't call to say he was here?"_

_Mia said, "I'm a quick learner. I've already learned not to trust people I don't know, especially in this life, and I didn't trust him so, I told him to stand and wait."_

_Dean smiled and said, "you really do learn fast. Good job," and high fived her._

_Sam said, "well, makes sense but, as he probably already told you, this is Jack. He's a nephilim but we raised him so he's more a glorified hunter, kinda like Cas, his dad."_

_Mia smiled as Jack put out his hand and she shook it as Sam said, "Jack, this is Mia, my girlfriend and a hunter in training."_

_Jack said, "girlfriend? Like Jess was?"_

_Sam let out a laugh and smiled at Jacks bluntness then said, "yes, like Jess was. But, more serious and lasting this time. I hope."_

_Mia smiled as they pecked lips then Sam pulled Jack aside and started whispering to him about something. Dean walked over to Mia and said, "okay so, tell me about what you've read so far."_

Mia's abruptly brought out of her daze by a crashing sound and jumps but also smiles to herself because so much changed so quickly in her relationship with Jack and they quickly became pretty close friends; Jack finally having someone newer than him and Mia having someone sorta new that she could kinda cling onto.

Jack loved that they taught him all they did but sometimes hated that he was the only one they were explaining something to. Mia loved Sam,   
Dean, and Cas, of course, but it was nice to have someone else to be confused with or even just to share the "first" something with and talk about the stresses of doing something that the other 3 may have forgotten about sometimes.

Mia finished eating then explored a little bit, wandering around wherever her feet took her, and ended up in the library.

She walked through the shelves and ended up pulling out a random book that had an interesting looking spine. As she sat down at a table, she opened it and saw the text change from Enochian to English so she could read it.

Mia got so caught up in reading that she didn't realize until Jack found her that she'd been reading for an hour already.

Jack noticed how engrossed in it she seemed to be so said, "you can take that with if you want and then when you're done I'll return it," as she went to put it back.

Mia smiled and said, "really? Cool! Thank you! Now, what's next on the tour de la Heaven?"

Jack, not getting that Mia was making a joke/reference to another language, simply said, "well, I thought I'd take you to some different personal heavens so you could see how they're all the same but also completely different."

Mia's smile got wider and she said, "sure! I'd love that!"

Jack smiled back and said, "great! Let's go!" and started walking towards the library door.

Once they left the library, they went back to the first hallway and opened a door on the right this time. Inside was a giant giant room, it almost looked like it's own world, with a **bunch** of people in it. In the middle was a **huge** house and around that, was everyone in their heaven. To separate heavens but also keep everyone together, there were walls about 7 feet tall between them but they were also only a few feet long so that if people wanted to, they could make friends and go to other people's heavens.

Mia looked around in complete amazement for a while, just repeating wow over and over, and Jack watched with a smile.

Eventually she said, "Jack was this your idea?"

He said, "kinda. Cas had the idea of making them separate but together and allowing people to go to other heavens if they wanted but I came up with the house, which is where they all sleep."

Mia said, "that's all amazing. I love this so much!"

Jack smiled and said, "glad you like it!"

Mia said, "I love it! So, can just anyone walk into your Heaven at any time?"

Jack said, "no. You have to be invited. But, no one would come in uninvited anyways because this is Heaven and we're all good and happy here. It's more a precaution. Cas has seen too my things go wrong that weren't supposed to."

Mia said, "that's so cool! And makes a lot of sense actually."

Jack said, "yeah. Hey, is there anything or anyone specific you'd like to see?"

Mia thought for a minute about asking to see her family or Jess but shook her head, not wanting to disturb them.

Jack said, "Mia, I know there's at least one person you want to see. And they won't even know you're there so you won't be bothering them. Even if they could you wouldn't be able to because it's happy here all the time."

Mia said, "are you sure?"

Jack said, "yes, Mia."

Mia sighed and said, "okay. Can we go see Jess? Her and I were close friends when she was with Sam and I miss her. Plus, I noticed that a lot of Sam's nightmares have to do with her and his mom. We never talk about them, and please don't mention them to anyone, but I'm always there to comfort him and I'd like to know that she really is okay and safe."

Jack said, "sure! And we can go see Mary too if you want!"

Mia nodded and said, "yeah, sure," regretting already that she slipped about the nightmares since Jack wasn't good with secrets.

They went to Mary's first since it was closer and Mia saw a beautiful scene of Mary and the boys making dinner together. Then, John came home from work so the boys ran to say hi as Dean gets scooped up into his dads arms. They all look happy and Dean truly looks untouched - undamaged.

Mia smiled and thought about having something like that for herself and Sam as well as felt such warmth and appreciation for the fact that there was at least one place in the world that they got to be a happy family.

After a few minutes, she looked at Jack and said, "thank you. Can we go see Jess now?"

Jack nodded his head and took her to her.

When they got there, it was a similar scene to the one she'd just left but in this one, Sam is cooking and Jess is coming home from work. As Sam comes out of the kitchen, Jess sets her stuff down then picks up a baby girl and kissed her forehead before Sam kisses Jess's lips. The baby starts whining a little so Jess gently rocks her to sleep as I, or well Heaven me I suppose, knocks on the door. Sam opens and gives me a hug, Jess coming a few seconds later. Sam goes back to cooking and Jess and I talk in the living room while she starts on grading papers and I go through Sam's case to help him out. I never saw myself going to law school but at the same time could see me helping him out in that way.

I once again smiled at the scene then gave Jack a side hug and said, "thank you."

He smiled and said, "you're welcome. You ready to go?"

I took one last longing look then nodded my head and we walked back to the door.

Once out of the room, Jack said, "are you ready to go home? I don't really have anything else to show you and have a bunch of other stuff going on in a bit anyway."

Mia said, "yeah. Thank you again Jack. This was all amazing and beautiful."

Jack said, "you're welcome. And when we get back you'll probably want to go lay down and sleep forever. You can go take a nap but you don't need to sleep for more than an hour or so, the traveling takes a toll on your bodies so it makes you feel extra tired."

Mia nodded her head then said okay and grabbed Jack's hand.

Jack made sure Mia's eyes were closed then brought her right back to the kitchen where he picked her up.

When she opened her eyes, Mia hugged Jack then said, "again, thank you. Today was amazing. And I think I am going to go take a nap. Bye," then hugged him again and walked off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you liked it! I really enjoy writing this chapter, even though I struggled sometimes. Remember; Always Keep Fighting, Love Yourself First, You Are Not Alone, and You Define You. Love y'all!
> 
> Quote of the week: Always Keep Fighting and Love Yourself First because I Am Enough and I am NOT Alone and I define me. I got this. There's nothing I can't do. I love me.
> 
> So, every morning when I brush my teeth and wash my face, I repeat this mantra to myself in the mirror while looking myself in the eyes. Then, after I say "I love me," I kinda give myself a mom look for a moment then soften my expression and really look for the beauty in my face. I'm not perfect and have days where I see more/less of things I like/dislike but slowly I'm feeling better about myself and finding more things I like than dislike about my face. I started it on the first of the year and it's really helped me so I thought this week I'd share it with you guys. Y'all are welcome to use it yourself or tweak it/add to it if you want, in fact I encourage you to do so. I really suggest you come up with at least one positive thing to say to yourself every morning in the mirror because, whether you think it will or not, it really does help and I actually started looking forward to doing it after a few days. Also, if you do use this, add to it, and/or come up with your own, I'd love to hear how it's helped you or what you added to it or came up with! (Sorry this explanation ended up being kinda long but I just wanted to express how much it's helped me and how I think it'll help you. 😁)


	7. Sibling Fun

Claire knocked on the bunker door, soaking wet from the rain, and slightly pissed because she took the bus, then Ben ran to open it and wrapped her in a big bear hug.

She threw her bag over her shoulder then said, "Ben, I'm soaked," but gave him a side hug as he shrugged and she said, "hey."

Ben said, "Hey," back then waved a hand and said, "come on! I'll show you to your room."

Claire said okay then followed Ben to one of the many rooms. She set her bag down then told him to turn around so she could change. When she was done, she turned around then said, "so, what do you wanna do?"

Ben said, "We could go play in the game room!"

Claire said, "yeah! What do you wanna play?!" as she started walking out of the room.

Ben smiled that big 'ol goofy Dean smile and said, "I'm gonna kick your ASS at Dance Dance Revolution!"

Claire said, "YOU'RE ON!!!" then they raced the rest of the way there.

A few hours later, Dean walked in from work and could hear them laughing from the door. He smiled and set his stuff down then walked to check on them and saw them playing pool.

His smile got bigger as he walked back to the table and said, "Hey Mia, how long have they been like that?"

Mia looked up and said, "huh? Oh, um," then smiled wide and continued, "pretty much since she got here."

Dean sat down and smiled again then said, "Good. I'm glad they're getting along."

Mia nodded and said, "yeah, I knew they would. They love each other, they just needed to be able to spend some time together."

Dean nodded his head and Mia went back to writing and remembered the first time she met Claire.

_It was about 6 months after she decided to go with the boys and they were all going to a family dinner at Jody's._

_When Jody answered the door, she hugged the boys then surprised Mia by wrapping her in a big warm hug and said, "Welcome to the family!"_

_Mia said, "thanks," then looked over and saw Claire and Kaia on the couch holding hands talking as Patience came out of a room._

_Jody said, "make yourself at home! Dinner is almost ready," then disappeared into the kitchen._

_Dean and Sam were already sitting on the other couch on their phones so Mia sat next to Claire, the only empty seat._

_She said, "Hi guys! I'm Mia!"_

_Claire waved at her then turned back to Kaia as Kaia said, "Hey Mia! Nice to meet you!" and stuck her hand out for Mia to shake._

_Mia did so then Kaia started to talk to her over Claire's shoulder, who looked upset._

_Kaia stopped talking after a few minutes and quietly said, "babe, what's wrong?"_

_Claire said, "I'm just not sure why you're getting to know her. She's probably gonna get freaked soon and leave."_

_Kaia said, "Claire! That's not nice!"_

_Claire said, "so? Everyone leaves us, especially now."_

_Kaia said, "Well maybe she won't."_

_Claire shrugged then walked to her room._

_Kaia followed, saying sorry to Mia on the way._

_A few minutes later, Claire and Kaia came back out and Claire gave Mia a hug then said, "sorry, it just seems like anyone who knows about us and what we do either leaves or gets taken within like a year."_

_Mia smiled then said, "it's okay. I understand. But I promise I'm not leaving. If I was, I'd have done so already but I love you and Kaia and everyone else. And of course Sam," then looked up and briefly smiled at Sam._

_Claire smiled and said, "really? You mean that?"_

_Mia nodded and said, "really. The only way I'm going anywhere is if Sam gets rid of me but I don't think he will," then smiled and they both laughed and hugged as Jody called for everyone to come to the table, Claire sitting between Mia and Kaia._

_Even though they started off kinda awkward, the girls were now pretty close, Claire even looking up to Mia and sorta seeing her as a mom and aunt, and Mia soon understood why she was so cold and harsh in the beginning._

Ben and Claire's sudden loud laughter as they came into the kitchen brought Mia out of her thoughts and she looked up then said, "Hey guys! You having fun?"

They both sat down at the table and Claire said, "yeah this is great! I'm not used to being away from the girls for this long, especially Kaia, but it's nice to be able to just hang out and not have to worry about anything."

Mia said, "yeah, I bet. If either of you have homework though, you might want to get some of it done."

They both groaned and said, "do we have to?!"

Cas walked into the room and said, "yes, now listen to your aunt and go get started please."

They groaned again then sulked off to get their backpacks, looking and sounding like real teenagers for once, which made Mia smile and laugh.

She said, "hey Cas. How was work?"

Cas said, "good. Nothing really new. Mostly the same. Even though I don't feel pain, I can tell that if I was human, I would be complaining about my feet right now."

Mia said, "why's that?"

He said, "because I just got off of a double shift and I hear everyone else complaining about theirs after a few hours."

Mia said, "yeah," as the kids came back, dragging their backpacks, and Dean burst into the room to say, "Okay guys! I just ordered pizza for dinner and we've got a bunch of junk food on its way that Claire somehow convinced me to get from... GoPuff?"

Claire said, "yeah dad I've told you! It's an app where you can order food and stuff then they'll bring it to you! It's not hard to understand."

Dean shrugged and said, "well, whatever. It'll be here soon. Work on your homework until it does."

When it got there, they quickly put their stuff away then Ben and Claire each devoured about 2 pieces of pizza before anyone could even really talk to them.

Once they slowed down a little, Dean said, "Claire bear, how's Kaia and Patience?"

Claire glared at Dean then said, "I told you not to call me that! But they're good."

Cas said, "are you and Kaia still together? How is that going?"

Claire smiled and you could tell she was just melting inside, as she blushed a little and said, "yeah we're good. She's amazing!"

Dean said, "well good. I'm glad. You deserve it." 

Claire smiled and said, "thanks Dad," then went back to her pizza.

When everyone was done with their pizza, they all moved to the entrance room - the one with the staircase and where the tree was at on Christmas - and Dean put a monitor up on one wall so they could watch a movie.

Once he set everything up, they all settled in and grabbed they own choice of junk food from the pile. There was so much there that Dean yelled at Claire (privately) then told her she had to pay it back somehow.

Dean picked the movie so no one knew what they were watching except him. They also didn't know he secretly was a huge fan boy when it came to this movie so they were in for a fun ride.

After the movie, Dean offered to take the kids bowling but they both said they wanted to go back to playing pool and Ben called a rematch.

Dean laughed then said, "okay. Have fun. I'm here if either of you want pointers."

They said okay as they walked out of the room then raced down the hallway to see who could get there first.

Ben got to the door first but struggled with the handle so Claire pushed him out of the way and ran to the pool table, declaring victory.

They smiled and laughed then Ben told her to set it up and pick her balls then break them.

At the end of the game, Ben had won but Claire refused to let him so she called for a rematch and that happened about 3 more times before Dean came in and said, "hey guys I know you're having fun and I love that you are but it's late and I still have to keep you on some sort of schedule even though it's the weekend."

They grumbled and complained, saying, "but dad!!"

He put his hands up and said, "ah I don't want hear it. Bed, please. Go say goodnight to Mia and Sam first, then your dad and I, then bedtime."

They sadly said okay then walked to the map room to say goodnight.

Dean smiled as they walked off because they were having so much fun that they didn't want to go to bed. He almost gave in just because of that but knew Jody would have his hide if she found out he let Claire stay up any later.

In the map room, Sam and Mia were talking while he ate so Ben and Claire awkwardly stood to the side for a few minutes so they didn't interrupt. When they were noticed, Mia and Sam called them over to give hugs and they both reluctantly received a forehead kiss from Mia.

After they both said goodnight to everyone, they went to their rooms and got ready for bed.

Once they were laying down, Claire texted Ben and said, "hey you tired yet?"

Ben said, "definitely not."

Claire suggested, "what if we see if we can sneak and play a board game or something?"

Ben said, "sure! Meet you there."

Claire said okay then they both slowly snuck out of their rooms.

They both got to the game room at the same time and quietly but quickly walked to the board games. 

About 5 minutes into the game, Dean happened to walk by and barely see Claire's blonde hair so, after smiling to himself, he went in and said, "hey, I thought I told you to go to bed."

Claire looked up at him and said, "yeah but we're not tired."

Dean sat down and said, "that's fine sweetie but I need you to at least go in your rooms. You'll have all day to spend together if you want. And you know you're welcome here as much as you want Claire."

She nodded her head then said, "I know. Let's go, Ben. I guess," then the 3 of them started to pick up the game.

After it was picked up, Ben put the game back and Dean pulled Claire into a hug then said, "thank you, kiddo. I love you."

She wrapped her arms around him and sorta snuggled into his chest then said, "you're welcome. I love you too, Dad."

Dean smiled then kissed her head and opened an arm for Ben to join the hug once he came back. Ben put an arm around each of them as Dean kissed his head as well. Then, Claire took one of her arms and moved it to put it around Ben as Dean squeezed them and said, "I love you both so much."

They both smiled then said, "I love you too."

The 3 of them stayed like that for a minute then pulled apart and Dean said, "okay. Goodnight. Off to bed."

They both said, "goodnight, Dad," and walked to their rooms. Once they got there, they briefly hugged then Ben said, "night sis. Love you."

Claire said, "night bro. Love you too," then they smiled and went into their rooms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N - Some Dad!Dean and cute/sweet sibling moments! Hope you enjoyed it bc I really enjoyed writing it! I've been obsessed with Eileen/Shoshannah lately so will probably be doing an Eileen focused chapter soon! Sorry I forgot to update last week! Still getting used to posting on here! Remember; Always Keep Fighting, Love Yourself First, You Are Not Alone, and You Define You. Love y'all!
> 
> Quote of the Week: "I don't think I ever allowed myself to hope or think about anything else than the step directly above the one we were standing on at the time." - Shoshannah Stern
> 
> Shoshannah said this in an interview I read and she was talking about when she was making "This Close," a TV series that she and her friend wrote and starred in, but I still found this relatable. I relate to this in a lot of different little ways but a big way is when I'm really really depressed because all I do is tend to focus on the next thing I need to do and just sort of go from there. There are days where all I can focus on is what I need to get done and don't allow myself to hope for things to get better or see how things could get better. I think we all struggle with this at some point and sometimes, like writing something, only focusing on the step ahead can be a good thing. But, we still should look at the bigger picture and have hope that what we want will come to us and will happen for us. It's a lot easier said than done, but I encourage y'all to continue looking at the bigger picture of things and have hope for the things you want.


	8. Nurse Cas

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! I realized after I posted the last chapter that I accidentally stopped doing The Road So Far thing and actually really enjoyed doing that so I'll start that again!

**The Road So Far: Mia's been going to work with everyone to get information for her book as well as be able to connect with them more. Ben and Claire had a sleepover at the bunker and Dean had to put his foot down a few times. He may not have wanted to but he was more scared of Jody than upset teenagers who understood why they needed to listen.**

"Hey Mia I need to be to work at 3 so I need you to be ready by 2:30," Cas said at dinner.

"AM?!" Mia said.

Cas smiled and said, "yes, AM."

Mia said, "okay. Even flying it really takes half an hour to get there?"

Cas said, "no it takes about 15 minutes but I like to be early."

Mia nodded as she got up with her plate then said, "well, goodnight everyone. Cas can you get me up by 2 please?"

Everyone said goodnight and Cas nodded then Mia kissed Sam and Charlie goodnight and left.

*morning (or night, depending on how you look at it)*

At 2:30 Mia walked into the map table room and said, "hey Cas. I'm ready to go."

Cas said, "great. Let's go!" then grabbed her hand and reminded her to close her eyes.

When Mia opened her eyes, they were in front of the hospital. It was the same one Mia drove past all the time but seeing it after flying made everything seem better and brighter somehow. The building was a simple red brick one with turquoise colored doors and signs but she now saw the beauty in the design and the colors somehow.

After she looked around for a few seconds Mia realized she was still holding Cas's hand and dropped it then said, "alright Cas, show me all the fun you have."

Cas smiled and said, "okay c'mon," then walked inside.

They walked to the crew room and as they did so, Cas pointed out different things like where his patients' rooms were and who was who then said whether he liked them or not.

In the crew room, a few other people were there and they all said hi as they passed Cas on the way out. One person stayed though, and Cas introduced them.

Cas said, "Mia, Hester. Hester, Mia."

Then Hester said, "Is this the same Mia you talk about all the time?!"

Mia smiled and said, "awww you talk about me?"

Hester said, "yes! All the time! He talks about you as much as he talks about everyone else but I think you might be his favorite. The way he just brightens up when you get brought up is crazy."

Cas said, "yeah that's because she's such a bright person and her soul is the brightest out of all of us and I feel and see that every time I'm around her or her name is mentioned."

Mia smiled and said, "aw thanks." 

Cas smiled then said, "you're welcome" and walked away from the girls to get dressed as Hester said, "how's Sam?! I sorta have a crush on him," then blushed.

Mia smiled then said, "he's good!," then leaned in closer and said, "wanna know something embarrassing about Cas?"

Hester nodded and Mia said, "did he ever tell you about the first time we met?"

Hester said, "noooo!"

Mia glanced at Cas, who was pretending not to hear, and probably wished he couldn't.

She said, "it was like 2 days after I'd decided to join Sam and Dean and we stopped at the bunker between hunts to restock on some stuff and so that I could get a little tour of it. Anyway, we were reloading the car and Dean had me put the cooler in while he finished something else. I walked into the garage and was looking down so all I heard was a loud 'buzzz' then looked up and saw Cas on top of the Impala. Naked. And covered in bees. I guess he was waiting for Dean and wanted to surprise him, again. Cas didn't notice me for a minute but when he did, he started blushing and scrambling to explain then eventually just poofed out."

Hester burst out laughing as Mia continued, "what he didn't know was that I'd already heard about the first time it happened so I put the cooler in then ran to Sam and could barely talk from laughing so hard at the parallels but told him what happened. Sam started laughing too then Dean walked in and asked what was so funny. We told him and he blushed and walked out, I think calling Cas on the way," then she and Hester kept laughing until Cas laughed and smiled as he said, "yeah that's enough. Mia, c'mon. Hester, your break's probably over."

Hester shrugged then gave Cas a hug as she walked out and waved to Mia.

Mia waved back then Cas said, "so Mia, first I've got to make rounds then, unless I'm needed somewhere, we'll have a little bit of a break to eat and talk for a bit."

Mia said, "okay! Who are we gonna see first?"

As they walked, Cas said, "a patient in her 60's. Her name is Marg. She's recovering from burns on her legs and part of her chest."

Mia said, "oh my gosh! What happened?"

Cas said, "I'm not sure. She's been here for awhile and she was just added to my rotation last week so no one really told me much."

Mia said, "oh gosh. How is she doing?"

Cas said, "good. She's healing nicely and pretty soon she'll be at a point where I can heal her if she wants."

Cas stopped for a second while he said, "well, here we are. You ready?"

Mia nodded her head and Cas opened the door then they walked in. Cas walked over to Marg and said, "hey sweetie. How are you feeling today?"

Marg said, "Cas! Much better now that you're here!"

Cas smiled bashfully and said, "thanks. I brought a friend with me today. This is Mia."

Mia smiled at her and waved as she walked to the bed. Marg took Mia's hand then said, "isn't Cas such a doll?"

Mia laughed and said, "I suppose so," as Cas started going around and checking all of the her IV's and other vitals. 

Mia talked with her for about 10 minutes before Cas said, "okay Marg, everything looks good and you seem great. I have to take Mia now though okay?"

Marg nodded and said, "oh okay," then looked at Mia and said, "come back and visit sometime will ya?"

Mia smiled and patted Marg's hand then said, "sure, bye. It was nice meeting you."

As they walked out, Mia said, "she's such a sweet lady."

Cas said, "yeah she really is. It's too bad her kids are too stubborn to come visit her. None of them will fly here. They all always tell her they're busy with work."

Mis said, "that's so sad. I'll definitely come back and visit her."

Cas smiled and said, "she'd love that."

Since Cas was still kind of new, he only had 4 patients so after they were done with those, they went to the cafeteria and ate.

Once they finished eating, Cas said, "so what do you want to ask me?"

Mia said, "what was it like pulling Dean out of Hell?"

Cas said, "it was..." then got a faraway look as he started seeing it replayed again.

" _Castiel! You're in charge of getting the Sword out of Hell. Get him, now!" Naomi had said with urgency._

_Castiel nodded then started the process of pulling Dean out. He not only needed to get to Hell but he needed to go to the deepest part of it, the Pit._

_He flew down there, struggling the whole time, then had to search for Dean._

_Castiel's wings had burned about halfway off because of the heat and fire so he was in pain the whole way but never said a word about it because the Mission was to get Dean. Dean Winchester. The Michael Sword._

_When he found him, he watched from afar at first. He watched how, even though he was trained to do this, and worse, Dean didn't seem to want to do it. Already there was something about Dean that was different than what they'd told him he was like._

_When Dean was between torture victims, Castiel went behind Dean and grabbed his shoulder, knowing as soon as he made contact that Dean would rise and Castiel would return to Heaven._

_When Castiel returned, Naomi was waiting to congratulate him on a job well done but Castiel felt uneasy and uncomfortable the whole time, and he knew it was more than just because of his wings still healing._

_The next time Castiel saw Dean, his only thought was that Dean looked and felt almost like a completely different person and he couldn't place his finger on it but he knew then that Dean would always be two things; still beautiful and still Dean Winchester._

After explaining this all to Mia, Cas said, "I knew when I found him in that barn that he was changed and still hadn't healed from the physical and emotional scars he'd gotten there. I could feel his pain. Not just his pain from Hell but also from everything he'd ever been through. But I could also feel all the love he had and that he hid it. Not very well, but most people don't. I knew there was more to him than they'd ever told me about him."

Mia said, "was that all because of the Profound Bond?"

Cas said, "yes. I didn't understand it then but that's why I knew so much about him and what he was feeling and how he thinks and what he wanted. I wasn't supposed to recognize all of those things but I was already starting to think on my own and rebel so that's why it happened with me but none of the other Dean and Cas's. The mark I left on him wasn't just physical. It was emotional and mental too. That's why he and I are so connected and seem to read each other's mind sometimes. Well, part of it. It wouldn't have been so strong if we didn't already have some connection."

Mia said, "wow, that's amazing."

Cas nodded then said, "you ready to get back?"

Mia said," yup," as she stood up and walked to throw her trash away.

The rest of Cas's shift was spent going on rotations and showing Mia around. Plus, there was one incident where Cas was needed to heal someone in the emergency room.

When they left to go home, Hester was in the crew room getting changed. Once she was done, she saw Mia and pulled her into a hug. Mia was surprised for a second but hugged her back and Hester squeezed slightly before letting go with a big smile on her face.

Hester said, "bye!" then walked out and Mia went on her phone while Cas changed. After he got done, he said, "alright, you ready to go home?"

Mia nodded and yawned then said, "yup! I'm ready for a nap!"

Cas laughed then said, "okay. Let's go."

As they walked out, everyone waved bye to them and quite a few gave Mia hugs and said they were glad they met her.

When they got outside, Cas grabbed Mia's hand then said, "ready?"

Mia said, "yup!" then closed her eyes and Cas smiled then poofed them home.

They appeared in the doorway and Cas told Mia to open her eyes.

After she opened her eyes and got her balance, Mia started to walk down the stairs but stopped quickly when she saw Eileen sitting in the chair.

"Eileen?!" Cas said, as he saw her about the same time Mia did.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N - hope you like it! There's a few references in here, like usual lol. Remember: Always Keep Fighting, Love Yourself First, You Are Not Alone, and You Define You. Love y'all!
> 
> Quote of the Week: "This one... and all of the others. All of them. Just their existence makes them divine because God is in everything." - Jack
> 
> Jack said this when he was taking his "test" to get Adam's rib so he could become the bomb and I just love it so much and find so much truth and beauty in it. We are all divine and beautiful and perfect because God is in all of us. God created all of us and we exist because of him. Everything, down to each blade of grass, is divine because it is a part of God and God is a part of it.


	9. Eileen?!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N - Everyone knows how to sign so they sign and speak when talking to Eileen.

**The Road So Far: Mia went to work with Cas and they talked about a lot. When they got back, Eileen showed up!**

"Eileen?! What are you doing here?!" Cas said.

She said, "I think I found a case and I know you're done hunting but I could use your help."

Sam walked in and said, "Eileen! It is you! What's the case?"

She said, "it's in California. At a school, Stanford."

Sam and Mia both said, "Stanford!"

Eileen said, "yeah, you guys know it?"

Mia said, "yeah that's where Sam and I met."

Eileen said, "oh cool. Well anyway, I think there's a poltergeist there. Um, people keep talking about hearing stuff in the hallways, and a few others have complained about their stuff mysteriously going missing. Three people have seen it and two people have gone missing so far."

Sam said, "okay! I'll do some research and figure out the connection. Eileen, you can help if you want."

She said cool and scooted next to him as Mia said, "I'm gonna go shower. I'll come back when I'm done."

She walked over to Sam and pecked his lips then left as Cas said, "me too," and followed.

In the shower, Mia started thinking about when she first met Eileen. 

_She was on a hunt with the boys and they ran into Eileen and the_ _4 of them_ _teamed up to get it done faster._

_Her and Eileen clicked right away and started teasing Sam about things he did to both of them and how_ _he was_ _were when they dated. Dean absolutely loved it and even joined in sometimes._

_When they finished the case, Eileen even came back to the bunker for a few days to spend time with Mia. Sam loved that they both got along but hated it because they teased him all the time._

_Eileen and Mia became so close that Eileen was the first person Mia called when she found out she was pregnant._

As Mia got out of the shower, she smiled at the memories and got dressed.

About 5 minutes later, Cas appeared at the table as Mia walked in with Charlie and Dean with Ash.

As they sat down, Ben got home from school and Sam said, "so get this... the 3 people that have seen something and the two that have gone missing are all best friends and are pretty much the leaders of Alpha Kappa Alpha. The 2 that went missing are roommates of 2 of the ones that saw something. The third one doesn't have a roommate but she _does_ have a girlfriend who basically lives there so I think she's next."

Dean said, "alright. Sammy, you get the gear, I'll call Jody to see if she can take the kids, and Mia and Eileen you guys get the food and beer."

Everyone said okay then Ben said, "Can I go?!"

Dean looked hesitant so Mia said, "Dean let him go. It might be his only chance to go on a hunt and he can stay with me or Sam the whole time. We know that school like the back of our hands. Plus, I was part of AKA for a short time so I know that'll help."

Dean chewed his lip for a second, thinking, before he said, "fine, but only if your dad says it's okay."

Cas said, "yes but only if you let me put protection sigils on you."

Ben rolled his eyes but said, "fine!"

Cas put a hand on his shoulder and his other one in front of his chest then said, "this is gonna hurt but you'll be okay."

Ben nodded then a white light came from Cas's hand as Ben yelled but did his best to play it off like his other dad would then sat down when Cas finished.

Dean started to walk out but turned back around to say, "Sam, are you sure you'll be okay? I know you haven't really been back there since..."

He trailed off and Sam said, "yeah. I'll be fine."

Dean said okay then went to Cas and said, "babe, go get some rest. Love you," then pecked Cas's cheek and walked out.

Cas smiled and blushed then nodded his head and poofed to his room.

*skip to Stanford*

The 5 of them stood at the edge of the campus under the cover of nightfall and Sam had a big grin on his face. They stood for a minute, assessing where to start, then Dean clapped his hands together and pointed to a building he figured out was the AKA house as he said, "alright we have to go there. Sam and Ben take the bottom floor, and Sam **don't** let Ben out of your sight. Eileen, you can take the 2nd and 3rd floors. Then Mia and I can take the 4th and 5th floors. Okay?"

They all nodded their heads and Ben rolled his eyes then they walked to the building and got started.

Everything was normal for a while, meaning no one found anything, but suddenly, there was a scream on the first floor.

Sam and Ben ran to it and when they got there, the poltergeist was leaning over one of the girls with its hand around her neck and the other girl was across the room, staring and not knowing what to do.

Ben quickly charged at it with the iron rod to get rid of it then Sam ran to catch the girl it had in its grip. He checked for a pulse but there was none so he looked at the other girl with sad eyes and said, "I'm sorry... we were too late."

The girl started crying as Sam and Ben realized they were all still exposed and could get attacked again at any time.

Sam said, "Hey, what's you're name?"

She said, "Hannah."

Sam said, "okay. Listen, Hannah, I promise everything will be okay but do you have any salt?"

Hannah nodded and Sam said, "okay. I need you to get it and then you and Ben need to get close to me and once we're together I need you to pour a circle around us."

Hannah said, "o-okay," and looked confused but did what she was told.

When they were all in the circle, Sam asked what happened and Hannah said, "I've been seeing her for a few weeks now, and then tonight I saw her in here and she just attacked my girlfriend and said it was for revenge."

Ben said, "revenge for what? Did you know her?"

Hannah nodded then said, "yeah. She was the other one in our group but about 2 months ago started acting really weird and then a few weeks after she killed herself and I started seeing her at her funeral about a week later."

Sam opened his mouth to speak as Dean burst through the door.

Sam breathed out, "Dean!"

Dean said, "Sammy! Are you okay?"

Sam said, "yeah, you?"

Dean said, "yeah. I figured out the connection. Let's get Eileen and go finish this thing."

Sam said, "so did we but Dean how- how did you figure it out?"

Mia said, "she attacked us in the hallway and we asked her. From what she said we were able to piece it together."

Sam nodded then turned to Hannah and said, "do you know where she's buried?"

Hannah nodded then said, "yeah. Brimrose Cemetery. I can show you the way. But why?"

Ben said, "we have to go salt and burn her bones so she won't come back."

Hannah said, "oh okay. Let's go, I guess."

Sam said okay then looked at Dean and said, "Dean, go find Eileen and we'll meet you out front."

Dean said, "got it," then walked off as realization set in Hannah's face and she said, "wait are- are you Sam Winchester?"

Sam nodded and said, "Yeah, why?"

She said, "because you're like famous around here for what happened to your girlfriend."

Sam said, "oh... what, um what do they say about it?"

She said, "that you set her on fire then left to avoid getting caught."

He said, "o-oh."

She said yeah then showed Sam how to get to the cemetery and turned to go back inside.

Sam said, "you're not coming with?"

Hannah said, "no I've got a dead girlfriend inside."

Dean, Mia, and Eileen had come out as she said that so everyone nodded and Mia and Eileen gave her a hug and said they were sorry.

Hannah said thanks then walked away as they walked to the Impala.

Once they salted and burned the bones, they went back to the hotel; Mia and Eileen in their room and Sam, Ben, and Dean in theirs.

Mia and Eileen stayed up half the night talking about Sam and Eileen even told her about Ruby.

"Hey did Sam ever tell you about Ruby?"

"Yeah the chick who helped him with his demon powers and stuff?"

"Yeah but did he tell you they dated?"

"When?"

"It started when Dean was in hell and continued pretty much until Dean killed her."

"Oh. No he didn't. I guess it never really came up though."

Eileen shrugged and said, "yeah. How's Charlie though?! I miss her!"

"She's good! You saw how big she was right? And she started talking a lot too. Sam's been working with her a lot when he can."

"That's so good! She's daddy's little girl huh?"

"Yes definitely! She loves him! She's his little princess, it's so cute!"

"Aww! I'm happy for you guys!"

"Thanks... Eileen?"

"Hmmm?"

"Do you ever miss him?"

"Sometimes. But I know he's happy and loves you and Charlie and you love him so it's okay."

Half asleep, Mia said, "yeah," then passed out. Eileen smiled and turned the light off then went to sleep.

Meanwhile Sam and Ben passed out soon after they laid down but Dean, as usual, stayed up drinking and drowned in his self hate and feeling like he didn't deserve anyone, but especially Ben, Cas, Jack, Ash, and Claire.

He definitely did deserve them but because of John he still struggled with accepting himself and accepting that he was loved and a good dad.

Eventually, he got drunk enough that he couldn't think anymore and finally passed out.

The next morning, they all got up and and went back to Stanford so Mia and Sam could show them around a little bit before going back to the bunker.

At the bunker, they unpacked everything then Mia and Dean were about to leave to get the kids when Cas walked in from work.

Dean said, "Cas!" and hugged him and pecked his lips as Cas hugged back. He was stunned by the sudden affection but enjoyed it and allowed himself to drown in it while it lasted.

As soon as it happened, the moment passed and Dean went back to being Dean.

"Mia, you ready?"

"Yeah let's go! Eileen, you're gonna stay at least until I get back right??"

"Yeah of course! I wanna see Charlie!"

Mia laughed then said okay and pecked Sam's lips and yelled "love you!" as she and Dean walked out.

When they got back, Eileen played with Charlie for about an hour before she fell asleep in her arms.

Eileen handed her to Mia and said bye.

Mia said, "you're leaving?!"

Eileen said, "yeah... I got a lot of stuff to get done at home."

Mia said, "oh okay. Bye! Love you!"

Eileen said, "love you too! Bye!"

They all waved bye then Mia said, "I'm gonna go out her down and take a nap myself."

Sam said, "okay babe. Love you!"

Mia said, "love you too!" and walked out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N - Hope you enjoy!! Remember; Always Keep Fighting, Love Yourself First, You Are Not Alone, and You Define You. Love y'all!
> 
> Quote of the Week: "It's so much better to be your authentic self." - Genevieve Padalecki
> 
> Two out of my three fics have a lot of Gen this week and I've been kinda obsessed with her this week so I thought I'd share one of my favorite quotes of hers. This one kinda explains itself so I don't have much to say about it except that I love it and it's become a permanent part of my phone background, even though I end up editing it almost every week.


	10. Destiel Date

**The Road So Far: Eileen showed up in the Bunker because she needed help and they all went on a hunt with Sam and Ben finding the creature then they all went to salt and burn the bones. Eileen and Mia stayed up late talking and Dean stayed up late drinking and drowning in self-hate while Sam and Ben slept.**

"Hey Dean, Cas said to be ready to go by noon tomorrow," Sam said as he walked into the map table room.

Dean said, "go where?"

Sam said, "I don't know but you're taking Miracle so probably the park or something."

Dean said, "okay. Why?"

Sam said, "Dean... Valentine's Day... It's why Mia and I are leaving Little Charlie with Big Charlie for the weekend."

Dean said, "oh," as Sam nodded then walked out. He realized he had nothing planned for Cas but that Cas had planned _something_ for them both and went online to look for ideas. He finally settled on the Valentine's Day festival for tomorrow night and bought the tickets. Dean himself thought the whole thing was cheesy and overrated but knew Cas would enjoy it. He was happy with his decision and decided to surprise Cas tomorrow when they were out.

Later that night, Jo had come to pick up Ash for the day and Big Charlie came to pick up Little Charlie for the weekend since Sam and Mia were leaving early in the morning and Ben had school.

The next day, Dean was up and ready extra early because he was nervous. At 11:30, while Cas was in the shower and Dean had already been ready since before Cas even got up and was busy pacing the room and nervously playing with the tickets. Miracle followed him back and forth the whole time with his tongue hanging out.

Dean finally sat down on the bed and ran his hands over his face then Miracle jumped up to lick Dean's face. He smiled and scratched Miracle's head then the dog decided to jump on the bed and put his head in Dean's lap.

Dean bent over and kissed Miracle's head as he heard the shower turn off. He hid the tickets in his jacket then laid back on the bed as Cas walked out and Dean quickly became lost in a flashback of their first date.

_It was Cas who finally took that first step and asked Dean out. It had been a month since he came back but he couldn't take their 'longing but never doing anything about it' looks so he went for it._

_One night, after dinner, Dean was washing dishes and had AC/DC blasting on the radio._

_Cas walked in and stood in the doorway, nervously watching him for a minute or so, before turning the radio down slightly to make his presence known._

_Dean turned around and nervously said, "Cas! Um, what- what are you doing in here?"_

_Cas leaned on the counter and said, "Dean... I was wondering... would um, would you have dinner... with me to- tomorrow? Like... like on a date?"_

_Dean swallowed then said, "uh yeah sure Cas. Of course," then smiled and turned back to the dishes._

_Cas said, "o-okay. Does 7 pm sound good?"_

_Dean said, "y-yeah sure."_

_Cas said, "cool. Um, Dean... wear cowboy clothes."_

_Dean said, "okay," and nodded then Cas walked out._

_At the restaurant, they got out of the car and walked to the stand next to it. Dean was confused but Cas just showed the guy two tickets and he let them in._

_Dean said, "Cas what-"_

_Cas said, "it's a gun show and then dinner and another surprise after," then smiled._

_Dean got a big grin on his face then said, "oh. Thank- thank you," as they took their seats._

_The show quickly started as Dean leaned forward in his seat with that wide-eyed amazement look he gets when he's super excited and internally fanboying. Cas watched him the whole hour in loving adoration with his little head tilt and eye squint trying to figure out what was so interesting about this stuff but gave up because it really didn't matter, it was still beautiful, still Dean Winchester, and that is what mattered to Cas._

_After the show, they went inside to have dinner and Dean got two burgers while Cas got a simple salad, causing Dean to make a joke about Sam getting to Cas with the "damn rabbit food."_

_They ate and talked and awkwardly laughed until about 9:30 then had a 15-minute argument about who was supposed to pay. Cas eventually gave in and let Dean pay because he knew he wasn't going to give in. Cas made sure to tip the waitress extra for having to listen to them fight though and she said she thought it was cute but Cas insisted anyway._

_After they paid and walked out, Dean started going to the car but Cas said, "Dean... This way. Your surprise remember?"_

_Dean said, "oh. yeah," and walked back towards Cas as they walked to the back of the restaurant._

_Around the back were a row of horse stables and a woman at the end holding a horses' reins along with some gear._

_When they reached her, she said, "welcome. My name is Kris and I will be your guide on the trail tonight. This is my horse, Flame. You two will be riding Belladonna. We have another horse, Wildfire, and usually I ride him, but he got hurt about an hour ago and we saw you had already checked in so we thought it'd be okay to let you both ride Belladonna while I used Flame."_

A/N - I have had a _slight_ obsession with the show Wildfire lately because of Gen being in it so all of the horses' names and the guide's name are from the show (Gen plays Kris and her and Wildfire are the main characters). If you've never seen it, watch it! It's amazing!

_Dean nodded then eagerly reached for the gear Kris had on her arm for Belladonna and she handed it to him then Cas offered to help Dean with putting everything on._

_Dean slowly stepped into the stall and had Cas follow then they each stood on one side of her and worked together to put everything on, though Dean insisted on putting the bite on by himself._

_After everything was on, Dean led Belladonna out of the stall then Kris climbed on her horse and told them to get on theirs._

_Dean, being way too excited and nervous, went to get on but missed the stirrups and fell on his ass. He blushed as Cas helped him and Kris stifled a laugh. The second time he got up then held Cas's arm to help pull him up._

_When they both settled, Kris led them to the trail and that lasted about half an hour. At the stalls, Dean and Cas helped take everything off Flame and Belladonna then they went home, with Cas falling asleep in the Impala._

Once Cas was dressed, he pulled Dean out of his thoughts and said, "Dean, ready to go?"

Dean, who was absentmindedly scratching Miracle's head and staring at the ceiling, said, "hmmm?"

Cas said, "are you ready to go?"

Dean said yes then nervously put Miracle's leash on. Cas picked up on Dean's nerves and tilted his head and squinted his eyes then said, "Dean, what's wrong? Why are you so nervous?"

Dean stood up straight with the leash around his wrist and pulled the tickets out of his pocket as he said, "I got these for us for tonight. Happy Valentine's Day, Cas. I hope you like them."

Cas took them and excitedly said, "Dean I love it! I can't wait to go tonight!"

Dean smiled and blushed as Cas threw his arms around Dean's neck and kissed his cheek.

Once Cas let go, he still held Dean's hand and said, "ready to go?"

Dean said, "Yup!" and Miracle barked then Cas smiled and told Dean to close his eyes before whooshing them to a park that was normally half an hour away.

They were in the shaded field area away from the actual playground and standing in front of a picnic splayed out.

Dean said, "Cas, this- this is amazing! Wow!"

The angel just smiled and tilted his head as Dean said, "and you got pie! I love you!" then kissed Cas's cheek and sat down. Cas sat down next to him and Miracle laid down off to the side, chewing on a bone Cas'd gotten him.

They talked and ate and people watched for about 2 hours then decided to take Miracle on the trail.

Dean held the leash and as the path narrowed, Dean and Cas had to move closer together and ended up holding hands, even after it widened again. Yeah, they were already married but Dean still had a hard time showing affection so Cas relished every moment it lasted and made sure to never point out when he didn't pull away because it then caused him to.

After a while, there was a small creek and it was hot out so Miracle went to get a drink and Dean took his shoes off, rolled his jeans up, and walked in a little bit. Dean tried to get Cas to come in too but he just wanted to watch Dean have fun so Dean gave up. He and Miracle ended up splashing each other and getting all wet, which Cas found adorable and funny at the same time.

When they got out, Dean asked Cas to dry them off and he did then they continued on the trail. As they walked, Dean said, "Cas, earlier I was thinking about our first date and... do you remember the trail guide, Kris?"

Cas said, "yes I think so."

Dean said, "well, didn't she look a little like Ruby to you or am I crazy?"

Cas did that damn head tilt and eye squint then said, "no Dean you're not crazy. I think they look alike too."

Dean said, "isn't that kind of weird?"

Cas said, "no, not really. A lot of people look alike in this world and, Ruby being a demon, she really could take almost any face or person she wanted."

"So Ruby could have been possessing Kris when we first met her?"

"Correct."

"But I thought when we killed her we killed the body too."

"We did but a lot of things got undone when Chuck became human and Jack became God. Either one of those things could have caused Kris to come back but not Ruby, or possibly Ruby too but in a different body."

Dean just nodded as the trail ended and they were on the other side of the park near a playground. All the kids saw them come out and they ran to pet and play with Miracle, who loved all the attention.

After the kids were done running around with him, the sun was going down and Dean realized it was close to the time for the festival to start. Luckily, they were in the right park and didn't have to walk far to find it.

Once they got there, they pushed their way to the front and waited about 5 minutes before it started.

The first person to perform did a cover of Can't Help Falling In Love by Elvis and Cas seemed to really enjoy it. It was now Dean's turn to watch Cas in amazement and wonderment. He couldn't help but get lost in those blue eyes and perfect face and fuck he loved that angel more than anything, except Sammy.

The rest of the festival went by in a blur as Dean mostly watched Cas and fed off his excitement, running to get drinks and food once in a while. Throughout the whole thing, it switched between a variety of performers and a few different raffles plus there was even a game you could come onstage and play. Cas tried to get Dean to do it but he wouldn't so Cas just watched happily with Dean's arm around his shoulders and Cas occasionally pecking Dean's cheek.

When the festival was over, Dean and Cas got one more hot dog and one more cotton candy each then ate it while walking back to where they first came, just enjoying each other, Miracle, and the night sky. After they finished eating, Cas whooshed them back home and they showered then went to bed in their matching pajamas, Cas in Dean's arms and Miracle on the bed at their feet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N - Hope you enjoy the cute Destiel!! If you haven't seen Wildfire, I really suggest watching it! It's amazing, especially if you love horses. To those who have read Twist and Shout and may have started crying at the mention of the song and/or Elvis, I'm sorry. I finally finished reading it myself and I'm still not okay. If you haven't read it though, I still suggest reading it because it is really good, even though it'll break your heart. Anyway, I hope you liked the chapter and continue reading my updates. Remember; Always Keep Fighting, Love Yourself First, You Are Not Alone, You Are Enough, and You Define You. Love y'all!
> 
> Quote of the Week: The things that can hurt you the most are those that you love more than anything.
> 
> This is a line from my friend's (Nayeliq1 on both Wattpad and AO3) book Happiness Is(n't) In the Having - which you should read if you ship Destiel - and to me, it's so true. You don't think about it until something happens but the things that end up hurting you the most are the ones that you love the most. This doesn't mean that you shouldn't love or get close to things but to me, it means that the pain shows how deeply you loved something, and the more pain you feel, the more and deeper you loved it.


	11. Lawyer for the Day

**The Road So Far: Dean and Cas went on a cute little Valentines Day date and Dean started to open up with his emotions a little more. We even got a little glance at their first date and how it came about.**

"Hey babe, I'm still going to work with you tomorrow right?" Mia asked as she set the plates down for dinner and Sam walked in for work, kissing her cheek.

Sam said, "yeah of course!"

Mia said, "okay. So we have to be up at like 8?"

Sam said, "yup! Hey Ben, since you've got the day off of school, you wanna watch Charlie tomorrow?"

Ben said, "Yeah, sure."

Sam said, "great," as Mia kissed Ben's head then said thank you and sat down.

*next morning*

Charlie woke up at about 7:30 crying for a bottle. Mia gave her one then went to wake up Ben so she could get ready.

Ben took Charlie into his room and laid her in her crib next to his bed, rubbing her back to get her to fall asleep, which she did pretty quickly.

Mia showered and got dressed then woke up Sam, who did the same while Mia made breakfast.

He came out about 10 minutes later and kissed Mia's head as she handed him a plate with avocado toast on it.

Sam said, "you know, I'm so glad I found someone who enjoys my 'rabbit food' with me."

Mia giggled then said, "yeah me too." 

After they were done eating, Sam said, "you ready to go, babe?" 

Mia said, "yeah I wanna check on Charlie first though." 

Sam said, "okay. I'll meet you in the car."

Mia said, "okay love you," and walked out as Sam went to the car.

Mia cracked Ben's door and saw him cuddling her with them both asleep on his bed. She smiled then closed the door and walked to the car.

When they got to Sam's office building, Sam introduced Mia to everyone on the way to his office, asking Dumah, his receptionist, what the first thing on his schedule was.

She said he didn't have anything until noon and that it was his weekly meeting with Tessa, his boss, to check in on how he was doing.

Sam said okay then showed Mia around his office. It wasn't much but he had stacked every inch he could with books; some about lore so he could keep up with it but mostly law books.

After he was done showing her everything, Sam sat down to get working and Mia sat next to him but kept glancing at the books on the shelves.

About 5 minutes later and like 100 glances, Sam said, "Mia, just go look at them."

Mia smiled and said, "thank you!" then practically ran over there and started reading the titles. When she chose one, she sat down in the comfy armchair Sam had next to the bookshelves.

Sam worked while Mia read for about 2 hours before she closed her book and went back over to Sam.

"What you working on baby?" She said and stood over his shoulder.

He looked up and said, "just getting caught up on these notes for a case before the meeting."

"Fun. What's the case about?"

"An angel felt she was discriminated against because she had her wings out."

"Oh. And you believe she was?"

"Yes. The law says they're allowed to have their wings out as much as they want as long as they're not disturbing anyone and she was in a pretty empty store when the owner came and asked her to put them away. Anna did nothing wrong and wasn't even knocking stuff over when she walked."

"It sounds pretty open and shut doesn't it?"

"Yes but the owner's arguing she was being disruptive and other stuff beforehand."

"Oh. Well, that sucks. You want any help?"

"Um, sure. You have good handwriting. I could have you start researching this case for me if you want?" as he handed her a case file.

"Sure. Let me see it and a notebook and pen."

"Here you go. And you can just sit across from me."

"Okay," she smiled and pecked his lips then settled in, putting her headphones in to concentrate.

They worked that way for another hour or so, with Mia occasionally asking questions before Dumah paged him to let him know Tessa was there.

Sam said to let her in then he and Mia started cleaning up. When she came in, Sam introduced them then Mia went back to her book in the chair.

Tessa and Sam sat down and she said, "so, how's the case you have now?"

He said, "good. I'm starting to get somewhere with the notes and the case is progressing nicely."

Tessa said, "good. And the new case?"

Sam said, "I've looked over the case file and had Mia start research earlier. She used to help me in college so I know she knew some of what she was looking for and she asked questions when she needed to."

Tessa said, "sounds like you have everything under control. Um, any questions or concerns?"

Sam said, "no I don't think so."

Tessa said, "okay great. Usually, I have more for you but that's it for today." They started to stand up and as they walked to the door, Tessa said, "oh and Anna said that she's really grateful you're helping her."

Sam said, "well I'm just doing my job but I'm glad she's happy."

They both smiled and Tessa went out then Sam turned to Mia and said, "Hey you wanna go get lunch?"

Mia looked up and said, "yeah where are we going?"

Sam said, "there's this little coffee place I always go to around the corner."

Mia said, "cool, sounds good."

When they sat down with their food, Mia said, "so Dean told me that he used to always take the beatings from your dad and that you guys felt the safest when he was passed out drunk and I was wondering what your opinion on that was."

Sam said, "yeah that's pretty accurate. Um, he always jumped in between us when Dad did happen to get a chance to get to me but he usually didn't have to. Dad didn't hit me very often, mainly Dean, and Dean would never let me jump in, though I tried. Most of the time Dad and I would yell, and fight that way, and then Dean would start being a smartass and talk back because he knew our conversation was headed towards me getting hit and he just refused to let it happen, especially because he eventually believed he deserved to always get beat on."

Mia put a hand on Sam's and said, "wow. I'm so sorry you guys went through all of that."

Sam said, "thanks, but it's okay. It's over now so whatever."

They ate in silence for a few minutes before Sam said, "do you have any other questions?"

Mia said, "do you have any happy memories of you 3?"

Sam thought for a few seconds then started talking about when Dean first drove the Impala.

_"It was sort of a surprise. I mean we knew it was coming soon since he'd been showing Dean more stuff about the car and letting him do more but it was still out of nowhere. We expected it to be at least after Dean turned 16 but a few days before he came in one morning and said 'boy you ready to drive?'_

_Dean had said, 'really?' and his eyes lit up and Dad said, 'yes now let's get going before I change my mind.'_

_Dean and I hustled out to the car, carrying as many bags as we could at a time, then he climbed in the front, Dad in the passenger side, and me in the back._

_Dean started driving and Dad started correcting him every 2 seconds but soon he got the hang of it and did pretty good. Dad still corrected him a few times but overall Dean was happy and Dad wasn't upset or mean and I was just happy Dean was happy."_

When Sam finished talking, Mia said, "wow that sounds like it was actually pretty nice.

Sam said yeah as he glanced at his phone and realized they were late and that he was probably going to be late for his next meeting.

They rushed out and Sam managed to gather all his stuff for the meeting then get to the room on time, though barely.

While Sam was in the meeting, Mia continued reading for a little bit before deciding to clean up and organize Sam's office for him.

When he came back, she was finishing up so he thanked her then said he had some notes to finish and then they could go home. Mia said okay and went back to reading.

About an hour later Sam started putting everything away and told Mia to get ready to leave.

When they got home, Mia said she was going to shower and see if Jack wanted to bring something for dinner.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N - Hope you enjoyed! Remember; Always Keep Fighting, Love Yourself First, You Are Not Alone, and You Define You. Love y'all!
> 
> Quote of the Week: Guess that's why we all hold onto life so hard. Even the dead. We're all just scared of the unknown. - Sam Winchester 
> 
> I like this quote because it shows that no matter who or what you are, we're all scared of not knowing and not living and that essentially puts us all on the same level. We should all love and care for/about each other because we never know when we're not going to be here anymore.


	12. On Hold

Hey guys I know you're hoping for an update this week but unfortunately I'm running out of ideas for this story at the moment so as much as I want to continue, I can't even think of stuff to finish the chapter this week and I've barely started it. I do plan on posting more chapters in the future but for right now am just struggling. I have a few ideas but I want to have more than those before I start posting again. If you guys have any ideas or suggestions at all, please feel free to share them. Thank you so much for reading and all your love and support. I really appreciate it. Also, I will still share the quote for this week since I'm still posting. I hope you guys understand and again I love and appreciate y'all so so so much. Remember; Always Keep Fighting, Love Yourself First, You Are Not Alone, and You Define You. Love y'all!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quote of the Week: Be more like Shep, be a penguin.
> 
> At the beginning of February, Gen shared her and Shep's intentions for the month and I commented saying I'd be more like Shep and be a penguin. Gen liked the comment so I told myself now I had to at least be a penguin for a few minutes so I made a video of myself waddling and sent it to my friend then the other day wrote the quote of the week on my water bottle as a reminder to just loosen up and have fun more and be more like a kid a little more often.


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